


WINGS

by Song_of_the_Black_Wolf



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Bullying, Child Abuse, Gender Issues, M/M, Suicide Attempt, yaoi no lemons
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-15
Updated: 2018-04-15
Packaged: 2019-04-23 07:56:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 25,410
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14328021
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Song_of_the_Black_Wolf/pseuds/Song_of_the_Black_Wolf
Summary: Levinia has been bullied and despised her whole life.  Thing is, she's not a she at all.  Levinia is a boy.  What will happen when a very stubborn Eren Jaeger pushes his way into Levinia's heart?  Will her fears of rejection when her true sex is revealed be justified?PAY ATTENTION TO THE WARNINGS AND TAGS:  MULTIPLE TRIGGERS; BULLYING, CHILD ABUSE (physical and verbal), ATTEMPTED SUICIDE AND SUICIDAL THOUGHTS!!!  Also, man x man, yaoi, gay, with no sex.  Sorry guys.  This story is not one of my best works, but it contains a very definite social message.  Statistics stated in story are from multiple sources and studies conducted over the past 12 years.





	1. Part 1

**Author's Note:**

> This was supposed to be a one-shot, but wound up too long, so I had to split it in 2. Thing is, until I had it finalized and edited and proofread, late day Friday, it didn't even have a title! Again, pay attention to the warnings; abuse, bullying and suicide triggers ahead. All statistics are from multiple sources from mostly USA studies. Most can be easily found on the web. This is a somewhat idealistic story, but with a very definite and strong message about bullying in it. Please read and, I hope, learn.

He sat at his desk with his back perfectly straight as he scribbled down notes on what the teacher was explaining to the class.  Most students were slouched back in their seats looking bored with the world.  He couldn’t do that.  For one, he needed to pay attention and get good grades or his parents would be very upset with him and because he wanted to get into a good college on full scholarship.  Second, his back still throbbed from where his father had used a switch on him.

 

The thin, flexible cane stung like hell when it struck his exposed skin.  It left angry red welts in its wake and sometimes, like last night, broke the skin and drew blood.  It was his own fault, really . . . or so he told himself.  He should have called to remind them of his trip to the library to research for a report he had to do for his physics class.  He made the further mistake of arguing by reminding them that he’d asked their permission that morning, so he hadn’t thought he needed to call.  It never crossed his mind that they might have changed their minds and wanted him to come home instead, though they had done this to him so many times before.

 

Now most reasonable people would have wondered why the parents didn’t just call their son at school and let him know that they had changed their minds.  Most reasonable people would think that a whipping was far too harsh a punishment to begin with.  But he wasn’t most reasonable people.  Such thoughts were only fleeting and in the deepest recesses of his mind.  And his parents were **_definitely_** not reasonable people.  Again, this was but a fleeting thought in the darkest recesses of his mind which he never acknowledged. 

 

As the teacher droned on, he scribbled down notes furiously.  He then felt something small hit the back of his head.  He didn’t have to look to know it was a spitball.  The hushed chuckles from all the students seated behind him told him as much.  Besides, it had happened countless times before; nearly every day ever since elementary school.  Kids were no more mature in high school than they were in kindergarten.  Even after the multiple school assemblies where the faculty talked about bullying and the harm it did and how it would not be tolerated, it was all completely lost on these kids.  As for himself, he thought nothing of it.  It was just a normal part of his life.

 

His parents had given him the whole “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me,” schtick.  There wasn’t a word of truth in it.  Words hurt more than any stick or stone, leaving scars that never truly faded if they healed at all, but he refused to acknowledge that.   He just did his best to ignore the hurtful words.  Even though he did cry, he would chastise himself for being weak and stupid for letting words hurt.

 

Another spitball landed in his shiny black hair.  He continued to ignore it, but in the depths of his mind he was tired of being constantly picked on and wondered what it was about him that made everyone hate him.  It’s not like anyone but his parents had even the slightest notion that he wasn’t a girl.  Hell, sometimes he forgot that fact himself.

 

That’s right.  The world thinks he is a girl.  It is not his own choice.  His parents never wanted a boy.  They had always dreamed of having daughters.  Needless to say, they were bitterly disappointed when they had a boy.  Worse still, in spite of repeated attempts, his mother did not get pregnant again.  The result was that when the boy was too young to know any different, they began dressing and treating him like a girl.  They had even gone so far as to give him a girl’s name on his birth certificate.  _I’ve been a disappointment to my parents since the day I was born.  And I’ve been disappointing them every day ever since.  Why can’t I do anything right?  What is wrong with me?  It’s my own fault.  I’m not trying hard enough._

 

“What’s the matter Levinia?  Is your head as numb as your brain?” the boy seated behind him whispered. 

 

“Nah.  She’s just too stupid to realize she’s a complete loser,” a girl chimed in.

 

“You’re so fucking useless, Vinia,” another girl added.  “All you’re good for is target practice.”

 

Another spitball and more soft giggles.

 

When the teacher turned around and asked a question, the entire class was the picture of innocence.  When no one could answer, she turned to him.  “Levinia, could you please tell the class what the rate of acceleration of gravity is?”

 

He groaned internally.  The teacher had no clue how much worse she was making things.  The students hated that he was smarter than them.  He never volunteered to answer questions but was inevitably called on when no one else could answer.  “9.8 meters per second squared,” he answered in a pleasant feminine voice.

 

“Correct,” the teacher approved before droning on. 

 

The next spitball was much larger and wetter.  “Way to make us all look stupid, Levinia,” a boy sneered.

 

Once class finally let out, he stayed at his desk, so he wouldn’t have to face his classmates in the hall.  One of the girls shoved all his things off the desk and onto the floor as she went by and continued walking as if nothing had happened.  Other students made a point of stepping on his books and papers.  He just sighed with resignation and picked up his stuff to leave.  This was how his school days usually went: being purposely jostled in the halls, books and papers knocked from his hands, cruel words spoken so other students would hear but not the teachers.  He stopped using his locker after finding his notes destroyed, or piles of garbage within, and a couple of incidents of someone changing his lock for another one so he couldn’t get in.  The school custodian chided him forgetting his combination, and the boy never told the man different.  It was all just another reason to call the boy stupid.

 

He retreated to the only place he could be left alone.  It was the old art room.   Ever since the new building had gone up a year ago, this room was no longer used.  It had a commanding view of the school grounds from its position on the top floor at one end of the main building.  It was bright and sunny as three walls of windows let in natural light.  Most importantly, it was quiet.  He liked to draw, and this was the only safe place to do so.  His parents disapproved of drawing.  They told him it was a waste of his time because he was terrible at it.  It was rare for him to defy his parents so blatantly, but this was his only way to escape the misery of his life’s constant failures. 

 

The vicious words of his classmates repeated like a recording in his mind as he worked. _“You should just kill yourself and be done with it, Vinia.”_

 

_“Yeah.  It’s not like anyone would miss you.”_

_“No shit!  We’d be better off not having to look at you, you useless bitch.”_

 

A tear landed on the drawing he was working on, as the memories of their words kept replaying in his mind.  _They’re right.  Nobody would miss me.  My parents wouldn’t have to live with the disappointment of having a complete fuck-up for a daughter. My classmates wouldn’t have to be tormented by having to be around me every day.  It would really just be better for everyone.  I wish I wasn’t such a coward!  Maybe if I had the courage to kill myself, Mom wouldn’t be so stressed from having to deal with me and she could get pregnant again and have a good daughter._

 

More tears fell on the image he had just finished.  It was, artistically, beautiful, though considering his frame of mind, disturbing.  It was of a hangman’s noose hanging from the branch of a large solitary oak tree atop a grassy knoll looking out towards the sunrise.  Though beautifully drawn, evocative and poignant, it spoke far too literally of the boy’s thoughts.

 

Going home was no better.  He ran just over six miles each way for no other reason than because he couldn’t handle the bullying he faced on the bus.  The bus driver was too busy watching the road to notice one girl being picked on and tormented.  _A horrible person like me deserves it anyway._   Rather than face his tormentors, he ran the entire way home.  When asked by his parents about this, he easily placated them with, “It’ll keep me from getting fat.”  They were appeased by this reason since they were continually harassing him about his weight even though he was too thin.  Girls were supposed to be slim and pretty.

 

He was denied all sweets and anything that qualified as “junk food”:  no chips, no pizza, no burgers or fries, no sandwiches.  He was never given any money of his own and was never allowed to take a lunch to school, for they feared he would eat something he was not allowed.  “Eating at school will make you sleepy and your grades will slip,” his mother told him.  His parents had him absolutely paranoid about gaining any weight.  The fact was, he was actually quite a bit underweight – not to the point of his bones sticking out everywhere, but far too thin to be healthy for a growing child regardless of gender. 

 

He stood about 5 feet 2 inches tall, had beautiful pale silver eyes that had a dark blue ring around the irises, long, straight, thick jet-black hair and spoke with a wonderfully soothing alto voice.  He always wore skirts, since his parents insisted that proper young ladies never wore pants.  They made him wear makeup, though usually nothing more than a bit of blush, thin eyeliner and some light-colored lipstick.  All in all, he was a beautiful girl, but that was never enough for his parents, and it was never enough to stop his schoolmates from tormenting him.

 

He had remembered to call his parents to verify the permission they gave him that morning to go to the library, but they were ignoring their phones.  He began to wonder if he was ever going to be able to get his report done.  Even so, when he returned home, he was relieved to see his parents were out.  A hot shower and load of laundry later, his parents returned home to find him doing his homework.

 

“Levinia, dear,” his mother cooed.  “I thought you were going to the library.”

 

“I was, but when I called to confirm if it was okay, I got your voicemails, so I came home instead,” he replied.  “I didn’t want to worry you.”

 

“Honey, we told you this morning you could go,” his father said sternly.

 

He was flabbergasted.  “But . . . yesterday . . .” he stammered.  He couldn’t shake the feeling this was a trap.  He concentrated on wiping the confused and surprise look from his face, took a deep breath and finally said, “Yes, Father.  I’m sorry.”

 

“Stupid, forgetful girl,” his mother said.  “Is it really so hard for you to remember the simplest things?  I really thought we raised you better than that.  You don’t even try!  Where did we go wrong?”

 

He fought back tears of frustration and sadness.  “I’m sorry, Mother.”

 

“You should be,” his father confirmed.  “We work so hard to raise you right and give you every advantage to succeed in the world and this is how you repay us?”  The man’s tone was fast getting louder and angrier.

 

The boy was losing his struggle to hold back his tears.  _I was wrong again.  Why am I always such a bitter disappointment to my parents?  Why can’t I ever do anything right?  It’s not like it’s so difficult. I just need to try harder. I want to make Mother and Father happy.  I don’t like stressing them out and upsetting them like this.  So why do I keep doing it?  Why am I such a hopeless loser?  They would be better off without me.  If I’m not around making them worry, maybe Mother could get pregnant again._

 

A loud smack followed by a pained squeal filled the room as his father slapped him hard across the face, almost knocking him to the floor.  “Are you even listening to a word we say, young lady?” his father demanded loudly.

 

“I do, Father, really I do,” he sobbed.  “I try.  I really try hard.  I don’t want to disappoint you and Mother.”

 

“THEN STOP LETTING US DOWN!” his father shouted.  “NOW GO TO YOUR ROOM!  I DON’T WANT TO LOOK AT YOU!”

 

He didn’t even hesitate a second.  He dashed out of the room and ran upstairs to his bedroom, closing the door quickly, but quietly.  He always needed to be quiet: no music, no tv, no talking unless spoken to or unless absolutely necessary, no walking noisily.  Even when he wanted to ask permission for something, he needed to be cautious as he never knew when his speaking would set his parents off.  Then, when he missed out on doing or getting something, his parents would inevitably ask, “why didn’t you ask us?”  He just couldn’t win for losing.

 

He fell onto his bed, buried his face in his pillow and sobbed, brokenhearted.  Things just always kept getting worse.  The harder he tried, the worse things got; the more he messed up.  He could remember a time, long ago, when he was a happy child and his parents were kind to him, but as the days, months and years passed, those days became fewer and farther between, until they didn’t exist at all.  He fleetingly wondered if it had all started when he’d discovered he wasn’t really a girl.  No, it had started before that.  He’d had “tomboy” tendencies and interests from an early age.  It had started with his mother scolding him for not being “lady-like”.  It escalated from there.

 

* * *

 

 

_It was the fateful day he learned that his body was not like other girls.  He already had been made fun of for preferring boys’ games and toys, but this day he would learn why.  He was eight years old, and his family was visiting his mother’s sister and her family.  After a day of playing in the pool, he and his cousin, Petra, went to her room to change out of their bathing suits into dry clothes.  As Petra removed her bathing suit, he noticed something very obvious missing between his eight-year-old cousin’s legs.  “Petra, where’s your peepee?” he’d asked in horror._

_Petra had looked at him in surprised, then started laughing.  “Oh, Vinia! Only boys have peepees!”_

_The world stopped for him in that moment.  After several moments of Petra trying to get his attention, he finally acknowledged her.  “Vinia, what’s wrong?  Do you have a peepee?”_

_Now embarrassed, he pulled down on the frilly skirt of his bathing suit that hid the tiny bulge between his legs.  Afraid that he would scream if he opened his mouth, he merely nodded in response to Petra’s question._

_“I’ve changed my little brother’s diapers, so I know what one looks like,” Petra stated calmly.  “Let me see.”_

_The poor boy hesitantly removed his suit._

_“Yep.  You have a peepee.  You’re a boy.  Maybe your parents just don’t know the difference?” Petra told him as if it were normal._

_He hurriedly pulled on his panties and dress, hating them because he now knew he wasn’t a girl.  Petra was smart.  She was never wrong.  “Please don’t tell anyone,” he begged her._

_“I won’t.  But . . . do you like being a girl?  I mean, you always did seem to like boy stuff better.”_

_Tears ran silently from his silver eyes and his lower lip trembled as he slowly shook his head.  “Mom and Dad want me to be a girl.  So, I’m going to be the best girl in the world for them,” he finally told Petra._

_Petra hugged him reassuringly.  “Well, you’re still my cousin, so I love you no matter what you are!”_

_He had made the mistake of questioning his parents about his being a boy, and that had been the first whipping he had ever received.  He never asked again.  He also never saw Petra again.   Soon he wasn’t even allowed to communicate with her.  It broke his heart.  Petra was the only kind person he knew._

* * *

 

 

His parents never called him down to supper, so he went hungry that night.  He went hungry many nights nowadays.  He was never allowed to take food without permission, and he learned the hard way that it was unwise to ask for it.  He took only what his parents gave to him.  If they didn’t offer him a meal, he went hungry. 

 

After finishing his homework, he eventually cried himself to sleep in spite of the pain gnawing at his empty stomach from not having eaten in nearly 48 hours.  The following morning, he was elated to wake up to a bowl of oatmeal with butter and fresh blueberries and blackberries.  After downing a glass each of milk and orange juice, he kissed his mother goodbye and ran the six miles to school.

 

Years of malnutrition left him exhausted by the time he got to school, but he ignored it as he entered the classroom for first period.  There was a boy there that he’d never seen before.  The boy was tall, had a long, pleasant face and hair that was dark and undercut below, but longer and sun bleached on top.  The new student was talking animatedly with the rest of the class that had gathered around the athletic looking newcomer.

 

_Great.  Someone else to pick on me.  They’ve probably already told him what a horrible person I am,_ Levinia thought.  The teacher walked in and instructed everyone to take their seats.  As Levinia sat down, the chair collapsed under him and he fell to the floor, hitting the back of his head hard on the edge of the desk behind him. 

 

Everyone burst out laughing.  “Way to go, Vinia!” someone sneered.

 

“Real graceful, Vinia!”

 

“Yeah, way to break school property!”

 

“She can’t even sit down right!”

 

“Not very lady like!”

 

He cursed himself for not paying closer attention.  This wasn’t the first time this had happened.  He had recently taken to switching out the chair at his desk for one of the spares at the back of the room to avoid such mishaps.  He berated himself for not checking the chair before sitting; for letting himself be distracted by the new student. 

 

“STOP LAUGHING!” an unfamiliar voice yelled.  “IT’S NOT FUNNY!”

 

Then the new boy was kneeling beside him.  “Are you okay?  You hit your head pretty hard going down.”

 

He looked at the new boy in bewilderment.  “Yes, I’m fine.  Thank you,” he mumbled.

 

“Are you sure?”

 

“Yes.  Thank you.”

 

“Don’t waste your time with her, Jean.  It’s just Levinia,” the girl that sat beside him said.  She was Kyla, the worst of his tormentors.  She was from a wealthy family, and she was pretty, and she was **_very_** popular.

 

The boy, Jean, ignored the girl and offered a hand and helped Levinia to his feet.  Jean pushed the broken pieces of the chair aside and put his own chair in its place.  “Here, use this one.”

 

He walked to the back of the room and grabbed one of the spares.  Before he could sit, another girl spoke up.  “Um, you don’t wanna use that one.”

 

Jean looked up with a scowl, then picked up his school bag, held it high and dropped it onto the chair which collapsed with a loud bang.  “WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?” he bellowed.  “She could have been seriously hurt!  Don’t you assholes know that bullying is wrong?!”

 

“Language, Mr. Kirstein,” the teacher, who’d been silent until now, wanting to see how this played out.  “Please continue,” he encouraged.

 

“Sorry.  Thanks.  Bullying is NOT harmless!  If you were the ones on the receiving end, you’d all be screaming for blood, but as long as you’re the one doing it, you think it’s okay.  I hate people like you!  I used to be a bully, you know.  I used to be just like you.  I picked on this one kid all the time in elementary school.  I got lucky though.  One day, I was on the receiving end from three middle school students.  That same kid that I had been bullying every day came to my defense.  He got a lot of cuts and bruises helping me fight those three off.  Now he’s my best friend, and I can’t imagine life without him in it.”  Jean stood, face red and fists trembling at his sides as he spoke.  “You idiots have no clue what Levinia’s really like, do you?  You’ve never even bothered getting to know who she is.  I’ll bet most of you pick on her just because you see others doing it; just to follow the crowd.  Y’all make me sick!”

 

“Thank you, Mr. Kirstein.  Go get a chair from across the hall,” the teacher instructed.

 

“Yes, Mr. Flagon,” Jean complied.

 

As for Levinia, he sat there feeling very self conscious, but also in pleasant shock that someone had so openly stood up for him.  Mr. Flagon said no more.  He simply assigned some reading, then began writing something down at his desk.  He wasn’t the first teacher to witness the boy’s torment.  He wasn’t even the first one to question the boy about it, but the boy insisted that he was fine and that the other students weren’t really mean to him, always making excuses for them and saying it was his own fault.  So, Flagon resigned himself to noting everything he witnessed and saving it for when the boy finally decided to ask for help. _I really hope that anti-bullying law gets passed soon.  Once that happens, we can take action regardless of whether or not the victim asks for our help.  We’ll finally be able to punish those who are doing the bullying._

 

Levinia never went to the cafeteria or outside during lunch.  He always retreated to the school library to study.  He also always sat next to the librarian’s desk, so he wouldn’t be harassed by other students.  He was surprised when Jean sat down across from him.  “Sorry.  Didn’t mean to startle you, Levinia.  I just wanted to make sure you were okay after this morning.”

 

He pushed a lock of hair behind his ear.  “I’m okay, really.  It looked and sounded worse than it was.”  He tried to fake a smile.

 

“Does this kind of shit happen a lot to you?” Jean asked.

 

“What?  No!  It never happens.  It was just a joke, honest.  They didn’t mean anything by it,” he insisted.

 

It was clear from the look on Jean’s face that he wasn’t buying it for a second.

 

“Don’t you have lunch this period?” Levinia asked, in an attempt to change the subject. 

 

Jean sighed in defeat.  “Yeah, but I’m meeting the soccer captain and the coach here to talk about joining the team.  I know the season started a month ago, but I’d still like to get in on this season at least for practices.”

 

“So, you’re meeting Eren Jaeger and Coach Shadis, then.”

 

“Is Coach Shadis really as scary as they say he is?”

 

Levinia giggled.  “He just looks scary.  He barks a lot but hasn’t bitten anyone yet.”

 

“It’s the ‘ ** _yet_** ’ that scares me,” Jean chuckled.  “What I don’t get is why he wants to meet in the library.”

 

“He likes Miss. Kindall.”

 

Jean put two and two together and looked over at the librarian’s desk.  “The librarian?”  Though not a classically beautiful woman, Miss Kindall was a handsome middle-aged woman with a bright, cheerful disposition, a great sense of humor and an infectious laugh; not what one would expect in a librarian. 

 

“Mhm.  Everyone in school loves her.  She tutors a lot of students and she’s very helpful,” Levinia explained.  “Coach is totally infatuated with her.  Thing is, everyone in school knows, including Miss Kindall, but Coach is completely clueless.  He doesn’t think anybody knows and he’s afraid to ask Miss Kindall out.  Kinda sad, really.”

 

At that moment Coach Shadis entered the library followed by Eren Jaeger.  The Jaeger boy was just a little shorter than Jean, with messy brown hair and large light sea green eyes.  Eren was also a newer student to this school, having only started this year.   He had fast proved his worth and his dynamic leadership skills to the soccer team and was chosen to be the captain even though he was only a Sophomore.  Jean watched as the face of the girl sitting across from him turned three shades of red upon seeing Eren.  _She’s totally into him!_ Jean thought.

 

“Hey, Jean! How’s the first day going?” Eren greeted. 

 

“All except for that bullshit in first period, great,” Jean replied.

 

“Watch the language, Kirstein,” Shadis warned.

 

Eren’s face lit up when he noticed Jean’s companion.  “Hey, Levie!” he greeted enthusiastically.

 

“Hey,” he replied quietly and shyly.  Eren was the only person in school to talk nicely to him.  It had started the very first day of school that year, when someone had purposely knocked the books from his hands.  Eren had come rushing over to help him pick up the mess of books and papers.  Levinia did everything he could to avoid contact with the kind and fabulous looking boy, but Eren was nothing if not persistent.  Eren was always saying hi and asking how he was doing and trying to engage in conversation.   He mistook Levinia’s stand-offishness as shyness rather than fear.

 

Levinia feared more than anything that if he let himself get too close to Eren, it would hurt more than he could bear when Eren rejected him when he found out Levinia was not a girl.  Besides, no one could really like a horrid person such as himself.  The more kindness Eren showed him, the more he feared the day he’d be rejected.  He tried so hard not to like the popular boy.  _I’m even more horrible than my parents realize.  I like another boy.  I know that’s not normal.  Mother and Father would be so disgusted if they knew what vile feelings I have for another boy.  I’m such a disgusting piece of shit!  Mom and Dad can NEVER find out!  Nobody can ever find out!_

 

He quietly excused himself and fled the library.

 

He went to the old art room; his private sanctuary.  He leaned on the large center table to catch his breath.  He shrieked when someone suddenly entered the room. 

 

Eren held his hands up in front of him in surrender.  “Sorry, Levie.  I didn’t mean to scare you.  I just wanted to see if you were okay.  You looked kinda upset when you left the library.”

 

“No!  I . . . um . . . I just thought you and Coach needed to talk to Jean.  I just didn’t want to be in the way,” he answered, a fake smile gracing his lips.  “Aren’t you supposed to be there now?”

 

Eren didn’t look convinced.  “Coach doesn’t really need me there to talk with Jean.  After all, I’ve known Horseface since 5th grade.  He’s my best friend.”

 

Levinia’s eyes widened.  “So, **_you’re_** the one Jean used to bully until you helped him with his own bullies?”

 

Now it was Eren’s turn to look surprised.  “Yeah.  How’d you know?”

 

“He mentioned it this morning in first period.”

 

Eren chuckled.  “Kinda hard to believe now that the guy used to be a complete asshole.  He’s really the nicest guy in the world.  I can always trust that he’s got my back, and I always have his.”  Eren took one of the chairs, turned it around and sat straddling it, resting his folded arms on the back.  “Wow.  How’d you ever find this room?  I never even knew it was here.”

 

Deciding that Eren wasn’t planning on leaving anytime soon, he sat down, his back straight and hands resting in his lap.  “It’s the old art room from before they opened the new building.  Supposedly the new art rooms are bigger and better, but I think they’re too cold and sterile looking.  This one is comfortable and used looking – like it has a lot of happy memories in it.  I know that sounds stupid.”

 

Eren smiled brilliantly.  “Not at all!   I actually agree with you.  The other rooms look like all the rest of the classrooms in the school.  This one **_looks_** like an art room should; paint and glue stains, the worn, exposed wood of the ceiling, all this natural light.”  He then noticed the drawings on the tables.  “Did you do these?” he asked as he moved them closer to look at.

 

There was no mistaking the deer-in-the-headlights look that filled Levinia’s face as Eren took hold of the drawings.  He tried to grab them back but was too slow.  “I . . . yes but . . . please don’t look!  They’re just ugly scribbles.  I only do them to relax when I’m alone.”

 

“These are really good!” Eren exclaimed, completely ignoring Levinia’s protests.  “I can’t even draw a halfway decent stick figure!”  A disturbed look the crossed his face as he noted the theme of many of the drawings.  Though all of beautiful places and things, there was always a note of death in them; a hangman’s noose, a bloodied razor blade, an empty pill bottle, a dropped smoking gun.  “Levie, do you really feel like these pictures?  I mean, they all seem to depict the feeling of dying or wanting to die.”

 

“No!  Of course not!” he protested quickly.  “They’re just . . . you know . . . um . . . reflecting what we as humans are doing to the beautiful world around us.”

 

Again, Eren didn’t look convinced, but decided to let it go for now.  “Well, they’re really beautiful drawings.  Do you take art classes?”

 

“Oh no,” Levinia answered.  “Mother and Father say it’s a waste of time; time I should be using to study.”  He glanced at the papers Eren was holding and sighed.  “They’re right, of course.  They don’t have a lot of money like some people.  If I want to get into a really good college, I have to work for it and get really good grades.”

 

“But you’re so good!”

 

“That’s sweet of you to say.  Not true, but sweet,” he replied.  “I really need to head to my next class.  It starts soon.”

 

“I’ll walk you there,” Eren offered as he immediately stood.

 

“You probably shouldn’t be seen with me,” Levinia responded.  “I’m a big girl now.  I can walk myself.”

 

“Why shouldn’t I be seen with you?” Eren asked in complete confusion.

 

“Being seen with someone like me would ruin your reputation.”

 

“What? That’s ridiculous!  First of all, I don’t even have a reputation at this school.  Secondly, if a good reputation means ‘not being seen’ with somebody, then I don’t want the reputation.  Thirdly, how could being seen with you possibly hurt anyone’s reputation?  Fourthly, what exactly is ‘someone like you’? And fifthly . . . um . . . if I come up with a fifthly, I’ll let you know,” Eren ranted.

 

Levinia stared at the floor.  “I’m just not someone you want to be seen with.  Just take my word for it.  And you do have a reputation.  You’re easily the most popular boy in school.  Even the student council president, Erwin Smith isn’t as popular as you are now.  Everybody likes you.  Nobody likes me.  So, you see, you shouldn’t be around me.”

 

“But that’s absurd!” Eren protested.  “You’re easily the prettiest girl in school, and you definitely the smartest . . . what’s not to like?  I know you’re shy and all, but that doesn’t mean people don’t like you.  They just don’t know you.”

 

Levinia turned away so Eren wouldn’t see the tear that escaped his eye.  “They do know me.  They’ve known me since elementary school.  I’m just not a good person.  Please, just leave me be.”

 

“You are a good person,” Eren insisted.  “I’ll prove it to you.  Hang out with me after school today.  We’ll go get coffee or burgers or something.   I don’t like assholes, so if you turn out to be an asshole, I won’t hang around you anymore, but since I already know you’re not an asshole, I’m probably gonna wanna hang around with you more.”

 

Levinia looked at him in shock.  “That’s really sweet of you, but I can’t.  I have to get right home after school.  It’s a long walk and I have homework to do.”

 

“Then I’ll walk you home,” Eren smiled.

 

“No.  My parents wouldn’t approve of me hanging around with a boy.”

 

“So, I’ll stop before we get in sight of your house.  You’re not getting out of this, Levie.  I can be very stubborn.”

 

The bell signaling the end of the period rang.  “Fine.  I’ll see you after school.  I have to get to class now.”  Levinia ran off as fast as he could, before Eren could ask where to meet him after school.

 

At the end of the last period, Levinia bolted out of the classroom as fast as he could.  He dreaded going home.  His parents would be furious with the stain on his shirt if they saw it before he could wash it out.  One of his classmates ‘ ** _accidentally_** ’ spilled grape soda on him.  He was grateful for the cool day, so he could cover his shirt up with his sweater.

 

He made it out of the building and across campus in record time, out ahead of all the other students.  He was hoping to be long gone before Eren could catch him.  _Not that he really meant it when he said he wanted to walk me home.  But it’s better to be safe than sorry._

 

He barely cleared the campus gate when he heard, “Levie!”

 

He froze in his tracks.  There, leaning against the wall just outside the gate was Eren, grinning ear to ear.

 

“I thought you might try to sneak off without me since you didn’t let me tell you where to meet me.  I told you, I’m stubborn.  I really wanna walk you home.  I promise your parents will never see me,” Eren assured.

 

Levinia brushed a few strands of hair behind his ear.  “You don’t understand, Eren.  I have to run to get home in time.”

 

“I’m a soccer player.  Running isn’t a problem for me,” Eren replied, the signature grin never leaving his face.  “Besides, it’ll keep me in shape since I don’t have practice today.”  When he received nothing more than a deflated stare he said again, “I can counter any excuse you give.  Told you I was stubborn.”

 

Levinia adjusted the backpack on his shoulders, and with a sudden burst of levity he teased with a smirk, “Well try ‘n keep up then, Eren Jaeger!”  He then took off running in the general direction of home.

 

“Hey!” Eren yelped as he ran after her.  “No fair!”

 

Levinia was half glad, but half disappointed that Eren kept up with him.  He’d set a steady, ground covering pace that was easy to maintain over a long distance, and Eren jogged right along beside him.  The part of him that was glad was just happy that someone actually **_wanted_** to be around him.  The part that was disappointed, however, was winning out.  He didn’t want anyone to find out where he lived.  He didn’t want to risk his parents finding out he had made a friend . . . especially if that friend happened to be a boy.

 

After running for just over 2 miles, Levinia stopped.  “You need to stop here.  My house is a couple blocks up,” he lied.  “My parents will be really mad if they see me with you.”

 

Eren looked disappointed.  “Can you at least get a quick cup of coffee with me?”

 

Levinia shook his head.  “No.  Sorry.  My parents are really strict about when I need to be home.  They’re right to be, you know.  It keeps me self-disciplined.  That’ll be important when I’m out on my own.  It also makes me keep my grades up so I can get into a really good college.  The better I do in school, the better I’ll do when I’m independent.  They’re only strict with me because they love me.”

 

_Who’s she trying to convince,_ Eren thought.  _Me or herself?  Something’s not right here.  She’s always looking so sad and defeated, but she’s really sweet and wonderful.  Why does she always look so sad?  What’s causing her to feel so bad about herself?  She deserves to be happy.  I have to try to show her how wonderful she is._   “Well, if you’re sure.  How about I’ll meet you here tomorrow morning and we’ll run to school together.   It’ll be great for keeping me in condition!”

 

“But . . . it must be so far out of your way.  And I have to leave so early to get to school on time!” Levinia protested.

 

Eren chuckled in response.  “You’re not the only one that needs to be self disciplined!  I’m used to getting up early anyways, so it won’t be a problem.  I’ll see you here at 6:30. Be safe and have a good night!” he called out with a wave as he turned back the way they had come.

 

The raven sighed in relief as Eren jogged away.  _Oh, thank god he didn’t try to insist on taking me all the way home!_ He turned and began to jog the remaining 4 miles to his house. 

 

The following morning, as promised, Eren stood at that same street corner, waiting for Levinia to arrive.  The raven had even left 20 minutes early to try to avoid him, but his heart still soared when he saw the boy standing there holding a small paper bag and two cups.  “Morning, Levie!” Eren greeted with his usual brilliant smile.  “I brought you coffee and a croissant!  Since we’re both early, we can take a few minutes to have breakfast together!”

 

“You shouldn’t have,” Levinia chided, but the smile on his face at the gesture taking all of the bite out of the scolding.  “I’m not allowed to have bread or sugar.  Carbs’ll make me fat!  And caffeine will stunt my growth.”

 

Eren laughed.  “Caffeine hasn’t stunted my growth.  Mom tells me I’m growing like a weed!  And Dad, he’s a doctor, says that carbs are necessary to maintain proper health.  We wake up with low blood sugar and need carbs to give our bodies the quick energy they need to get the day started.  I may be a dumb jock, but I know my human health stuff.”

 

The smaller boy blushed.  “You’re not a dumb jock.  If you were dumb, you’d be failing all your classes and you couldn’t be on the soccer team.”  He hesitated a moment for reaching out to accept the coffee and pastry that Eren was offering.  “Thank you.”

 

“No problem.  I hope you like the coffee.  I didn’t really know how you like it, so I had them add sugar and cream like mine,” Eren said as they began walking towards school.

 

Levinia took a sip of his coffee.  His silver eyes widened.  It was wonderful!  Hot, but not enough to burn, creamy and sweet and slightly bitter all at once.  “It’s so good!” he exclaimed.

 

Eren laughed out of relief.  “I’m glad you like it.”

 

The small raven paused long enough to pull the croissant out of the bag and taste it.  It was flaky and tender inside with a thin, flaky, crispy crust outside.  It was buttery and every bit as wonderful as the coffee.  “Wow,” was all he could say.

 

“Right?” Eren agreed around a big mouthful of his own croissant.  “I know they’re kinda plain, but I love them!  Either by themselves or filled with ham or bacon or sausage and egg and cheese.”

 

“That sounds really good, but really fattening,” Levinia commented.

 

Eren rolled his eyes.  “What is it with girls obsessing over getting fat??  Females should have a bare minimum of 21% body fat to be healthy, and men 18%.  The right amount of fat is both healthy and beautiful.   Too little and your body can’t function properly and, in the case of us adolescents, reduces our ability to grow properly.  Not eating enough will stunt your growth far more than coffee can.”

 

“Your father has taught you a lot.  You must really look up to him.”

 

Eren nodded before drinking the last of his coffee.  “I do.  He’s a really good doctor and a great dad.  No matter how much work he has, he always finds a way to spend time with Mom and me.  I’ve gone to work with him quite a few times.  He’s taught me so much.”

 

“You gonna be a doctor?”

 

“No.  I love learning about medicine, but my real passion is . . . you promise not to laugh?”

 

“I promise.”

 

“I **_really_** love geology.  Earth sciences are the only classes I get A’s in.  I get B’s in math, but I get C’s and D’s in the rest.  I totally suck at history.  Not much better at English.  Mom says I need a tutor.”

 

“I could do it,” Levinia said quietly.

 

“You could?  Really?!” Eren exclaimed with a huge grin.

 

“If we do it during lunch.  That way I can still get home when I’m supposed to, and my parents never have to know.”

 

“That’s perfect!  We can meet in the old art room and study while we eat!”

 

It only took a couple of days for Eren to realize that his love interest never ate lunch.  When he questioned her about it she’d answered, “Mother and Father don’t want me eating at school.  They say it will make me sleepy and hinder my ability to pay attention to my afternoon classes which would make my grades slip.”

 

“That’s nonsense, Levie!” Eren countered.  “You need to eat partway through the day to refuel your body and brain.  Eating nothing but carbs **_can_** give you a quick burst of energy but leave you crashing a couple of hours later, true, but a good lunch with lots of protein and fruits or vegetables will give you long lasting energy that will kick in after the carbs wear off.  Here, have half of my sandwich.  It’s got turkey and alfalfa sprouts and cranberry and herb cream cheese.  It’s really good!  Mom owns a deli and she makes the best bread and sandwiches! She’s the one who makes those croissants we eat every morning.”

 

“I really shouldn’t,” Levinia protested.  “Besides, I’m not hungry.”  Just to make a liar out of him, his stomach chose that moment to growl loudly.

 

Eren deadpanned at the noisy abdomen.  “Really.  Cuz your stomach is telling me something different.  C’mon.  You’ll love it!  It’s a **_really_** good sandwich.”

 

After a little more prodding, Levinia gave in and accepted the sandwich.  Eren hadn’t been kidding.  The flavors were incredible.  _It’s not like Mom and Dad will ever find out._

 

Every day Eren made sure to bring enough lunch to share with Levinia.  Primarily because he could tell, even under the loose clothing, that she was underweight, but he also delighted in showing her new flavors and experiences.

 

Eren was elated one week later when he got to show Levinia the A- that he got on his latest history test.  As the weeks went by, his persistence began to pay off.  Levinia was becoming more comfortable and relaxed around him.  He was rewarded with seeing her smile and hearing her laugh.  It saddened him to think that he may be the only person to have ever seen a genuine smile on Levinia’s face.

 

As the weeks went by, Levinia found himself liking Eren in spite of himself.  He’d had a crush on the green-eyed beauty since the first time he’d laid eyes on him but had always berated himself for having a crush on another boy.  _As long as Eren doesn’t notice, I’ll be fine.  I’d hate to have him start to like me and then hate me when he finds out what I really am.  At least now he’s nice, but if he found out what I really am, and that I have a crush on him . . . then he’d be disgusted, and he’d hate me, and he’d be right to.  I’m a disgusting, horrible person._

 

Their daily interactions did not go unnoticed.  Kyla, who was very interested in Eren decided to do something about the competition.  After all, she was the most popular girl in the school.  She should have the most popular boy in school as her boyfriend; it was only natural after all.  She and her ‘groupies’ as Jean had called her friends, approached Levinia and Eren as they left school.  “Hey, Eren!” she greeted as she ran up.  “Haven’t seen you at lunch for a while.  Where’ve you been?”

 

Eren gave her his signature smile – but then, he smiled at everyone.  “Levinia’s been kind enough to tutor me during the lunch hour.  My grades have gotten better since she’s been helping.”

 

“Oh.  Isn’t that nice.  So, where you off to now?  Wanna go get soup and sandwiches at that new café with me?” Kyla asked.

 

“No thanks,” Eren replied.  “I’m walking Levie home.”

 

“Oh,” Kyla responded with a very fake smile.  “Well how about tomorrow after practice, then?”

 

“Sorry, Kyla.  I don’t wanna be rude, but I’m not interested in you like that.  You’re just not my type.”  Eren was not so dense as to not know when someone was making a pass at him.

 

“Well a loser like Levinia can’t possibly be your type,” Kyla sneered.  “You deserve so much better.”

 

Eren’s eyes darkened along with his expression.  “Well she’s better than you.  I don’t like self entitled people that think they’re better than everyone else.  And I especially dislike bullies.  Don’t think I don’t know how you treat Levie.  Jean has told me all about it.  Not cool, Kyla.  Not cool.  C’mon, Levie, let’s go.”

 

For his own part, Levinia was stunned.  _He stood up for me?  Why would he do that?  She’s right; I’m a complete loser.  And she’s so beautiful and rich and popular.  Why would he **not** want to be with her?  _

 

“Levie, please tell me you don’t believe any of the bullshit that bitch spouts about you,” Eren pleaded as they left by the school’s main gate.  “You’re absolutely wonderful!  You’ve been so kind and helpful to me.  I’m actually getting A’s and B’s instead of C’s and D’s now.  Mom and Dad are thrilled.  And I really like spending time with you.”

 

Levinia froze as he spoke.  “But . . . you . . . why?  I’m nothing special.  I’m not a good person at all!  I’m a disappointment to my parents and I make all my classmates unhappy.  You . . . you shouldn’t be . . . You really shouldn’t hang around with me.  It will only lead to you getting hurt or disappointed.  You’d end up hating me . . . and I couldn’t bear that.”  Tears began to show in his eyes as he spoke.

 

“I’ll decide who I do and don’t like for myself, thank you very much,” Eren retorted seriously.  “I don’t give a rat’s ass what other people think, and I don’t believe for a second that you’re not a good person.  And I don’t see how you could ever do anything to make me hate you.”

 

“But . . . you only say that because you don’t know what I am,” Levinia protested.  “If you knew . . .”

 

“Piffle!  I still don’t believe it.  I don’t care what you are.  It’s **_who_** you are that’s important.”

 

Tears ran unchecked down his face.  “Please, Eren, you can’t.  You shouldn’t be around me anymore.  I don’t want you to get hurt.  Just . . . please . . . STAY AWAY FROM ME!”  Sobbing, he turned and ran away as fast as he could. 

 

Eren stood there in shock as he watched the girl run away from him.  “What have these assholes done to you?” he quietly asked no one in particular.  “I’m not giving up, Levie.  It’s too late.  I’ve fallen in love with you.”

 

Levinia’s day just got worse from there.  His mother was waiting when he got home.  She immediately noticed that the boy had been crying.  “What’s wrong, dear?  What made you cry?” She asked.

 

“It’s nothing, Mother,” he replied.   “I just have a headache.”

 

“Oh, sweetheart!” his mother exclaimed as she drew him into an embrace.  “My poor, sweet girl!”  The woman then got a strange, and very unsettling look on her face.  “Levinia.  Is that garlic I smell on your breath?”

 

The color drained instantly from his face.  That day, Eren had brought his mother’s homemade hummus and vegetables for dipping.  The hummus had been made with roasted garlic.  It had tasted great, but Levinia failed to consider that the smell of garlic would linger on his breath and that his parents would be able to detect it.  “It was just some fresh vegetables and hummus.”  He hoped the fact that it was healthy vegetables would mean that his mother wouldn’t be upset.

 

There was a loud smack as his mother slapped him hard across the face.  “How many times have your father and I told you about eating at school?  We’ve told you that it would make you sleepy in the afternoon and make your grades slip.  Are you trying to make yourself fat?  That will only make you uglier than you are!  And how do you think other people feel having to smell garlic on your breath for the rest of the day?  I thought we taught you to have more consideration for others.”

 

Fresh tears ran anew down his face.  “I’m so sorry, Mother.”

 

Another slap.  “And how many times have you said that before, only to go and disappoint your father and I all over again?”  Another slap, this one causing his nose to bleed.  The slapping continued until his face was swollen and red.  “Just wait until your father gets home and finds out about this.  He’ll be furious!”

 

His mother hadn’t been kidding.  He heard his father come home as he lay shaking in fear and sobbing into his pillow. 

 

“YOUNG LADY!  GET YOUR ASS DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW!” the man bellowed.

 

Levinia was so terrified, he actually lost his footing as he went down the stairs and fell.  His father grabbed him up roughly by the arm.  “You damn, clumsy little bitch,” the man told him.  “It’s bad enough you defied your mother’s and my direct instructions, but you can’t even be bothered to walk correctly!  How could we have raised such a pathetic girl?”

 

“Please, Father, I just didn’t want to offend my classmate by saying no,” Levinia tried.

 

“You tell them that your parents said no, and they’ll understand,” his father countered as he dragged him down to the basement, his wife following.

 

“Please, Father!  Don’t!” he pleaded.

 

“Don’t argue with me, young lady!  Or this will be worse than it’s already going to be,” his father warned.

 

His mother tied his wrists to the hot water line, burning the flesh and earning a scream that was instantly muffled by a gag being tied around his mouth.  She then tore his shirt open in the back and stepped aside as his father proceeded to beat him mercilessly with a switch made from a young sapling, much like was used in olden days.  The beating continued until he could no longer stand on his own.  He was then locked down in the basement for the night, wrists burning against the hot water pipe.

 

* * *

 

 

Eren was very disturbed when Levinia failed to show up for school the rest of the week.  He still waited for her on their usual street corner, but she never showed.  His relief was immense when she finally showed up the following Monday.  “Levie! Where have you been?  I’ve been so worried!  Why didn’t you text me?”

 

Levinia smiled sweetly; that fake smile made Eren nervous.  “I’m sorry, Eren.  I didn’t mean to worry you.  I disobeyed Mother and Father and they took my phone away.  Then I got sick last week and was stuck in bed.  But I’m feeling much better today.”

 

“That’s good.”  Eren couldn’t quite shake the feeling that something else was seriously wrong but dismissed it for the moment.  “Here.  I brought you your coffee and croissant.”

 

“I can’t, Eren,” Levinia replied.  “My parents told me not to, and I don’t want to disobey them.  I can’t disappoint them.  I want to be a good daughter.” 

 

“But it’s not healthy,” Eren protested.

 

“Eren, please.  Don’t ask me to disobey my parents.  If you insist on being a bad influence on me, I won’t be able to tutor you anymore,” Levinia insisted.

 

Eren didn’t know what to do.  He wanted to argue and insist that her parents were being unreasonable.  At the same time, he didn’t want to push her away anymore than he had, so he let it drop.  “Alright.  I’m sorry, Levie.”

 

“You really shouldn’t insist on walking to and from school with me every day,” Levinia added.

 

“Technically, it’s not every day,” Eren argued.  “After all, I have soccer practice three afternoons a week, plus games.  I only walk **_to_** school with you every day.”

 

Levinia rolled his eyes.  “You know what I mean.”

 

“I know.  But I like being with you.  I like being around you.  Walking to and from school and at lunch are the only times I can do that.”

 

Now at this point, Levinia should have continued to tell Eren to go away, but the fact was, he liked being around Eren.  He liked how nice Eren was to him.  Eren was the first real friend he’d had since Petra.    He knew he shouldn’t get too attached, but he was so love starved that he couldn’t help himself.  “Brat,” he said with a genuine smile on his face.

 

Levinia made a point of always entering the classrooms at the last second to avoid the cruel taunts of his classmates.  The problem this morning was that one of the students distracted the teacher down the hall from the room and Jean was distracted outside by one of the girls.  There was no one to stand up for the boy this morning.

 

He tested the chair before sitting down.  Just as he was about to sit, Kyla kicked the chair out from under him.  He let out a shriek as he fell, his head again hitting the desk behind him.  “So, you actually think Eren would like an ugly little loser like you?” Kyla laughed, the rest of the class laughing with her.

 

“She’s such a clumsy idiot.”

 

“She’s such a complete loser.”

 

“And the little bitch actually thinks a popular guy like Eren would really like her!” Kyla added. “Let’s get one thing straight, Vinia.  You will **_never_** be good enough for Eren.  He’ll realize that soon enough, so why don’t you make this easy on yourself and give up on him now.  It’ll save you so much heartache later on.”

 

“Oh my god!  She likes Eren?  What a joke!”

 

“I know, right?  What makes her think she’d ever have a chance with him?”

 

“But he’s nice to me!” Levinia protested.  “He’s my friend!”

 

Everyone laughed.  Kyla laughed louder than all of them.  “Oh please!  He’s just taking pity on a poor ugly girl.  Once he realizes what a complete loser you really are, he’ll drop you like a hot potato.  I have an even better idea.  Why don’t you just save everyone a heap of trouble and kill yourself?”

 

Tears ran down his face as he jumped up and fled the room.  “Levinia!” Mr. Flagon called after him.  Levinia ignored him and ran all the way to the bathroom.  He locked himself in the handicap stall and sank down in the corner.  He saw all of the words scratched into the walls and doors.  He’d always tried to ignore the words.  “Sticks and stones may break my bones,” he recited quietly through his tears.  “But words can never hurt me.”

 

_Levinia is an ugly bitch_

_Vinia is the biggest loser in the world_

_Everybody hates Levinia_

_Levinia should just kill herself_

_I wish Vinia would just die_

_Levinia makes everyone look stupid_

_I’ll laugh when Vinia dies_

He buried his face in his knees and sobbed.  _Why do I always make everyone so miserable?  Why do I always disappoint my parents?  Why can’t I do anything right?  The more I try, the worse I make things.  Maybe I_ **should** _kill myself.  Everybody would be happier.  I wouldn’t make my classmates unhappy, and I wouldn’t disappoint my parents anymore._

 

“Levie?”

 

His breath caught in his throat when he heard Jean’s voice.  “This is the girl’s room!” he blurted.

 

“I don’t care,” Jean replied.  “I saw the look on your face when you ran out of the classroom.  What happened?”

 

“It’s nothing,” Levinia replied.  “It was my fault.”

 

“Bullshit,” Jean replied.  “Please, Levie, come out so we can talk.”

 

“No.  You need to get to class.  I’ll be fine in a few minutes.”

 

Jean scowled at the locked stall door.  A quick inspection under the door told him that she was sitting in the corner and not using the toilet.  Levinia squeaked in surprise as Jean came in under the door.  “Eren’s a bad influence on me.  I’m getting to be as stubborn as he is,” Jean grinned.

 

Levinia giggled in spite of himself.  “It’s sweet of you to worry, but I’m fine.  Really.” 

 

“The tear stains on your face say otherwise.  What did those jerks do to you?”   Then Jean noticed the writing on the bathroom stall walls.  His eyes widened in horror, then darkened in anger.  “Oh my god, Levie . . . This is so wrong!  Why hasn’t the janitor removed this bullshit?”

 

“Why would he?” Levinia asked seriously.  “I mean as soon as he does they just write more.  Besides, it’s not like it means anything.  They’re just words.”

 

“Again, the tears in your eyes say otherwise.  What happened in class?

 

Levinia got to his feet and went to leave the stall.  “I was just clumsy and missed my chair.”

 

“Then why is your back bleeding?”

 

Levinia’s heart stopped for a moment as cold horror gripped him.  He knew that the scabs on one or more of his whip lashes had come off and bled through his shirt.  It only took him a couple of seconds to come up with a convincing lie.  “I must have reopened the scrapes from when I fell last week.  I told Eren I was sick because I didn’t want him to worry, but I was a little late leaving for school last Tuesday morning and I mis-stepped when I was running down the stairs outside my house.  I scraped up my back pretty bad and broke my phone and my parents kept me home from school the rest of the week.  Must have reopened them when I missed the chair.”

 

Jean, however, was not so easily convinced.  “I don’t believe you . . . but I’m not going to force the issue . . . for now.  Just . . . Tell me what happened in the classroom.”

 

Levinia sighed in defeat.  “It really is nothing.  Kyla was afraid that Eren liked me, or something.  It’s kinda funny really.  Why would someone as cool as Eren Jaeger like a homely girl like me?  Anyways, she now knows that she has nothing to fear from me.  I explained I was just his tutor and nothing more.”

 

Jean scowled even more.  “In other words, that bitch knocked your chair out from under you and spread a bunch of cruel lies in front of the entire class.  Does that about sum it up?”

 

Levinia looked at the floor.  “Yes.”

 

“Levie, you have to tell someone about this; a teacher, the principal, the nurse, someone.  What these jerks are doing is wrong.”

 

“No.  It’s okay, really.  I just need to be stronger than them,” Levinia insisted.  “It’s just words, and words can be ignored.  Come on.  We need to get back to class.”

 

“Levie,” Jean whispered as he watched her leave the girls’ room.

 

* * *

 

 

Weeks passed with nothing really changing.  Levinia continued tutoring Eren during lunch and letting him escort her for a couple of miles before and after school.  She now refused to eat anything he offered.  He worried when she would miss school, because he suspected that her parents abused her, though he had no proof.  He’d thought about following her all the way home but feared losing the trust he’d managed to earn.  He was at a loss for what to do.

 

He loved talking with her about anything and everything.  Turned out they had a lot in common, such as a love for exploring nature and the ability to see beauty everywhere and had similar tastes in music.  They would occasionally sing together, secure in the knowledge that no one else could hear them.  He loved how kind and selfless she was and how she always tried to see the good in others.

 

It bothered him how little Levinia was allowed to do.  He often thought that she was all too often just making excuses for people’s cruelty and blaming herself when she shouldn’t.  He couldn’t understand how anyone could not like her.  He wanted nothing more than to show her the world and see her experiencing everything for the first time.   He wanted the whole world to know how absolutely wonderful she was.

 

As for Levinia, he was trying very hard not to become too attached to Eren.  As much as he’d had a crush on Eren, the more he got to know him, the more it began to develop into something more.  He knew that eventually he had to let go.  He knew that Eren would hate him for being deceitful and letting him believe he was a girl.  But Eren was like a drug that the love starved boy couldn’t get enough of.  Eren was so kind and gentle and thoughtful.  _But I can’t encourage him to care about me.  I can’t let him love me.  I don’t want him to get hurt._

 

Winter was nearing its end.  There was a long weekend coming up, and tomorrow school would be releasing early.  Levinia was in a good mood.  He’d successfully completed both a physics and a history research paper and even turned them in with time to spare.  He’d thoroughly enjoyed lunch today, when he, Eren and Jean had played a word association game, since they were caught up on their studies.  Levinia couldn’t remember the last time he’d laughed so hard – in fact, he didn’t ever think he had. 

 

Then it happened. 

 

It was the one thing that Levinia had feared the most.  Eren stopped him just outside the school.  “Levie, I need to tell you something.  I’ve felt this way for quite a while now, but I think it’s time I told you.  You see, I’m in love with you,” he blurted out clumsily.

 

Levinia’s heart skipped a beat.  “Oh no,” he gasped.  “You can’t!  I . . . I’m so sorry!  I didn’t mean to encourage you.  I’m so sorry.  You can’t love me, Eren.  You’ll only get hurt if you do.”

 

Eren was genuinely confused.  “But you didn’t encourage me.  I fell in love with you just for being you.”

 

Levinia began to cry.  “You don’t understand!  You don’t know what I am!  You’d hate me if you knew!  Please, just forget you ever met me!”

 

“I don’t care what you are,” Eren insisted.

 

“You only say that because you don’t know.”

 

“Then tell me.”

 

“I can’t.  I just can’t!  I’m so sorry, Eren!”

 

With that he turned and fled as fast as he could, sobbing as he went.  Eren just stared after him in hurt disbelief.  “I don’t understand.”

 

Levinia stopped partway home, no longer able to see past the tears.  _How could have this have happened?  I’ve tried to discourage him.  How could he possibly fall in love with a useless bitch like me?  I disappoint and hurt everyone around me; my parents, my classmates; everyone.  Surely, he knows I’m not worth his attention.  I knew this day would come.  I knew I shouldn’t have hung around him so much.  I just wanted to help him get good grades.  I told myself not to get to close to him, but I’m so stupid, I did it anyway.  This is all my fault!  If he knew what a sick person I am; if he knew that I’m really a boy wanting another boy . . . he’d hate me even more that he does now.  It would have hurt him so much more!_

 

By the time he composed himself and returned home, his parents were waiting for him.  He knew he was in for it, being so late, but at this point, he felt he deserved it.  What he got instead shocked him.

 

“Guess what, Levinia,” his mother greeted.  The edge to her voice had his insides instantly in knots. 

 

“What is it, Mother?” he asked sweetly. 

 

“I had a lovely doctor’s appointment today,” she began.  “I went in to get a sonogram.”

 

Levinia’s face lit up.  “A sonogram?  You mean, you’re pregnant?  That’s wonderful Mother!”

 

“Yes.  It is wonderful.  Especially since it’s a girl.”

 

“Oh, Mother!  That’s so good to hear!”

 

“Indeed,” his father said.  “Do you know what this means?”

 

“I’m finally going to have a little sister!”

 

“Yes.  But more importantly, it means we don’t need you anymore,” his father growled.  With that, he punched Levinia in the face, knocking him to the floor where he landed against the bottom steps to the stairs.

 

“What?”  He looked back up at his father in fear.

 

“Think about it.  We’re finally going to have a **_real_** little girl,” his father sneered.  “There’s no need for us to pretend anymore.  We no longer have to pretend that a complete failure like you is our daughter.”  He viciously kicked the boy in the ribs.  He then grabbed the boy roughly by the hair and dragged him to the front door.  “If I ever see you again, I will make you wish you’d never been born, because I sure as hell wish you hadn’t!”  With those final cruel words, he threw the poor boy out the door where he fell down the steps to the sidewalk below. 

 

For several minutes, he lay there, bruised and bleeding and sobbing uncontrollably.  _So, it’s true.  Mother and Father don’t love me.  They_ **never** _did.  I’m so terrible they_ **never** _wanted me.  How did they put up with me for so long?  I suppose I should be grateful they did.  Kyla was right.  Nobody will miss me if I’m dead._

 

Shivering in the late winter cold, without any coat to keep him warm, he picked himself up and, still sobbing, started running. Though he had no destination in mind, he eventually found himself at the school.  _Well, since I’m here, I might as well go in.  I can go to school one last day.  I’ll get to see Eren one last time._

 

He slipped in a sub basement window that he knew didn’t have a lock on it.  He went to the girls’ locker room, showered and cleaned up his cuts and scrapes.  Afterwards, he went to the janitor supply closet and took a coil of rope.  He retreated to the old art room, wrote out a letter, then curled up in the corner and cried himself to sleep.

 

The following noon, as school let out for the long, holiday weekend, Jean quickly found Eren.  “Hey, Eren!  Something’s up with Levie!  She’s acting really strange.  She didn’t have any of her books or homework for first period today.  She didn’t even have her bag with her.  She never forgets that stuff!”

 

“Oh.  I think that’s my fault.  I told her how I felt yesterday, and she acted like it was the most horrible thing I could have told her,” Eren replied remorsefully.

 

“I think it’s something more than that,” Jean said.  “She has this dead look in her eyes.  You better go talk to her and see for yourself.”

 

As soon as the final bell rang, Levinia rushed up to the art room.  _Since my parents don’t want me anymore, there’s no need to keep pretending I’m a girl,_ he thought as he stripped off and shredded his clothes with a pair of scissors that were in the room, especially the hated skirt and panties.  _Everyone is going to know that I was a boy.  I refuse to leave this world with people thinking I’m a girl!_

 

He then used the scissors to cut off all of his long, straight hair, letting it fall to the floor.  Finally, he took the rope he’d taken from the janitor’s closet, secured one end to the old heating pipes, tossed the other end over one of the rafters and tied a noose in it.  He stood up on one of the chairs, tears streaming silently down his face, placed the noose around his neck, and with no hesitation, kicked the chair out from under him. 

 

He didn’t drop far enough to break his neck and he began to slowly and painfully suffocate, but he didn’t care.  _I fuck up everything I do.  Stands to reason I can’t kill myself right either.  No matter.  I can’t breathe, so the end result will be the same.  Only fitting I should suffer before oblivion._   He hung there limply, not struggling against his chosen fate at all.  In his fading mind, he reveled in the idea that eventually, someone would find his naked, male body hanging from the rafters, find his note, and realize what had been done to him.

 

As consciousness finally began to fade, his vision finally going dark, he thought he saw someone burst into the room.  _You’re too late,_ he thought as blackness finally took him.


	2. Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How will Eren react when he discover's that Levinia is really a boy? Will he still love him/her, or will he reject him/her as he/she fears he will?

Eren knew exactly where to find Levinia.  He knew exactly where she would go if she was feeling bad.  He opened the door and was immediately dismayed and horrified by what he saw.  He noticed two things: first, the girl he was in love with had hung herself; second, the girl he was in love with was a boy.  “NO!” He shouted as he rushed across the room, grabbing a chair as he went, pulled a pocket knife from his jeans, jumped up on the chair and cut the boy down. “Don’t do this to me!  Don’t die!”

 

He held the smaller boy in his arms.  As he loosened and removed the noose, he was relieved to find a pulse and a slight rise and fall of the chest as the boy breathed.  “Hang in there, Levie.  Please don’t leave me.”  He pulled his phone from his back pocket and called for an ambulance.

 

“Please state the nature of your emergency.”

 

“I need and ambulance at Sina High School, Rose Building, Room 418.  A student just tried to hang himself.”

 

“I’m calling emergency crews now.  Please stay on the line.” There was a brief pause. 

 

“Shiganshina Fire and Rescue.”

 

“Yes, I have a young man on the line at Sina High School, Rose Building, Room 418 that says a student just tried to hang himself.”

 

“Is the victim still alive?”

 

“Yes,” Eren answered.  “Barely.  Please hurry.”

 

“We’re on our way.”

 

“Okay, now please continue to stay on the line until emergency personnel arrive.  Can I please have your name?”

 

“Eren Jaeger.”

 

“Thank you, Eren.  Do you know the victim’s name?”

 

“Levinia Ackerman.  Everyone thought he was a girl.  I guess that’s part of why he tried to hang himself.”

 

“Do you know his age?”

 

“Approximately sixteen.”

 

“Height and weight?”

 

“Roughly five feet two inches . . . can’t really tell the weight . . . he’s really thin.  Maybe ninety pounds soaking wet.”

 

“Alright.  Is he still breathing?”

 

“Yes.  Barely.”

 

Eren then noticed a neatly folded paper on the floor where it had fallen in his rush to cut Levina down.  As he continued to cradle the broken boy in one arm, he reached out and took the paper.  Tears ran down his face as he read what he now knew was Levinia’s suicide note.

 

**_To Whom It May Concern;_ **

****

**_I know how much everyone hates it when someone kills themselves with no explanation, so I’m leaving this note to explain my actions to whomever finds me._ **

**_Legally, my name is Levinia Ackerman, a girl, sixteen years of age.  That’s what everyone knows me by.  As you can see, however, I am NOT a girl.  That was my parents’ idea.  I never wanted to be a girl.  I lived my whole life as a girl, but I die a boy.  You needn’t bother telling my parents what happened, because they don’t care.  Mother is finally having a REAL girl, so I’m not needed anymore.  There is no one to miss me and no one to care.  I make everyone around me miserable.  Just ask my former classmates or read the notes in the girls’ bathroom.  I apologize for making everyone so unhappy, and I thank them for putting up with me all these years.  I’m sorry I couldn’t be the kind of daughter that Mother and Father could be proud of.  I won’t disappoint anyone anymore._ **

**_Please tell Eren Jaeger that I’m so sorry for deceiving him.  He was always so kind to me, but he really does deserve someone better; a real girl._ **

**_I apologize to the person that has to clean up any mess my death may cause.  This was the cleanest way I could think of.  I hope you won’t be emotionally scarred by finding my body.  I’m sorry and I know it’s selfish, but this really is best for everyone._ **

**_Thank you and goodbye_ **

**_I’m sorry._ **

****

**_Levi Ackerman_ **

****

**_P.S. If it’s not too much trouble, I’d like the name Levi on my grave marker (If I get one) instead of Levinia.  Thank you._ **

 

Eren took a picture of the note with his phone, then hugged Levi tight to his chest as he cried.  “Oh, god.  Levi, I’m so sorry.  I didn’t know.  You didn’t deserve any of this!  Why couldn’t people just accept you for the wonderful person you are?”

 

“Eren?” the emergency dispatcher inquired.

 

Eren sniffled.  He’d forgotten about the dispatcher.  “There’s a suicide note,” he explained.  “He’s been bullied at school and abused by his parents.  You should see all the whip marks and bruises and cuts and scrapes all over his body.  How could anyone do this to him?  He’s such a sweet person!”

 

A soft, raspy moan from the naked boy in his arms caught his attention.  “Levi?  C’mon Levi.  Wake up for me.”

 

At first, Levi didn’t know what to make of the strange new sensation.  He’d never experienced it before.  He felt safe and warm and comfortable.  _It’s as if someone is holding me.  This must be Death’s embrace.  I like it.  It feels so safe._   Then he thought he heard someone talking.  _Who is that?  It almost sounds like . . ._  He took in a long, slow breath.  Then he opened his eyes.  The feeling of safety instantly evaporated.  _NO!  I can’t be alive!_ Tears immediately began to run down his face.  _I have nowhere to go!  I have no one to care!  I have no reason to live!_

 

“Oh, thank God!” Eren exclaimed as held Levi in a tight embrace.  “I thought I’d lost you!  Don’t ever scare me like that again!”

 

“Why?” Levi rasped, his throat terribly sore from the noose’s merciless grip.

 

Eren looked the sobbing raven in the eyes.  “What do you mean, why?”

 

“Why did you have to interfere?  Why couldn’t you let me die?  You know what I am.  You know what a horrible, sick person I am.”  It hurt so much to talk, but he had to know.

 

Eren pulled Levi to his chest in an embrace once again.  “I don’t care what you are.  I told you; I fell in love with **_who_** you are.  Yeah, I’m shocked.  It’s a surprise finding out that the girl you’ve been pursuing is really a guy, but that doesn’t change who you are.  All I know is that when I came in that door, I was terrified.  All I knew was that the person I loved more than anything in the world tried to kill themselves.”  Eren began to cry anew.  “Thank God I wasn’t too late!”

 

Levi was too stunned to react.  _He loves me?  Even though he knows I’m a boy . . . he loves me?  But . . . how?  Isn’t is wrong to love another boy?_  

 

“I love you, Levi.  I love you,” Eren said.

 

Levi buried his face in Eren’s shoulder.  Part of him feared this could be another cruel joke at his expense.  _Nobody can love me.  I’m unlovable.  How can anyone possibly love me?  But . . . Eren would never be that cruel . . .would he?_   “I love you too,” he mumbled.

 

At that moment, a police officer, followed by paramedics and firemen entered the room as Eren’s heart soared at hearing Levi’s words.  Amazingly, he actually thought to tell the dispatcher, who was still on the phone, “Help is here.  Thank you very much for you help.”

 

The paramedics began examining Levi, horrified by the number of injuries he had on top of the damage done by the noose.   The police officer that had responded was a plain clothes detective that had been the closest.  He reached out a hand for a shake with Eren as the boy was moved away from Levi, so the paramedics could work.  “I’m Detective Nile Dawk.  Can you answer a few questions for me?”

 

Eren gladly explained what he had seen and heard, making sure to tell Detective Dawk about the bullying and that he suspected parental abuse, and was sure to mention that Jean was a witness to the bullying and tried stopping it.  He also handed over the note.  Not wanting to leave Levi’s side, Eren accepted Detective Dawk’s offer to give him a ride to the hospital.  Before leaving, Eren called his father.  “Dad, please tell me you’re at the hospital today.”

 

“Yes, I am.  I’m making my rounds.  What’s wrong, Eren?”

 

“Remember that girl I keep telling you about?  Levinia?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Well, she’s a he and he just tried to hang himself.  He’s got injuries all over his body.  They’re leaving the school now to bring him in.  Please, Dad.  He really needs your help.”

 

“Okay, Son.  I’ll be waiting when they get here.”

 

Eren sighed with relief.  “Thanks, Dad.”

 

Many students were still in the courtyard after school.  They were very curious about the all of the emergency crews.  As Levi, now covered in a blanket, which he pulled up over his head because he didn’t want to be seen, was taken out to the ambulance, murmured rumors rippled through the onlookers. 

 

Suddenly Eren heard an all too familiar voice say laughingly, “Maybe Levinia finally decided to off herself.”

 

Without a second’s thought, Eren turned and punched Kyla in the face.  “SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU HEARTLESS, MURDERING BITCH!!!”

 

Kyla fell in absolute shock, barely comprehending what had just happened.  Nile grabbed Eren by the upper arms to restrain him.  “Hey!  Knock it off!”

 

“She’s the worst bully of them all!” Eren accused as he strained against the detective’s grip. 

 

“Calm down, Eren!  You won’t do your friend any good if you’re in jail for assault.  Now let’s get going,” Nile told him.

 

Eren fumed the entire ride to the hospital.  “There should be a law against this bullshit.  There should be a permanent record and legal punishment for saying and writing shit like ‘So and so should kill themselves’ or ‘So and so is such a loser’.  Levi’s life was hard enough at home without assholes like Kyla making it worse.  And instead of telling her she’s wrong, everyone else goes along with her because she’s popular and they want to be liked by the popular girl.  How does a complete bitch like that even become popular?  Seriously.  I don’t understand.  How can people actually think it’s okay to torment another human being and purposely cause them pain?  How can anyone possibly think it’s funny?  How is it okay to torment someone to the point of such misery they try to kill themselves?”

 

Nile contemplated Eren’s words as the boy ranted the entire ride to the hospital.  _The kid’s right.  The state senate is supposed to be voting on that anti bullying law tonight, but they’re still arguing over whether or not it should be made retroactive.  I think I’ll go with Chief Zackary to talk to the senate tonight after all.  Maybe if they know about this, they’ll put that law through a little faster._

 

Because this was also a child abuse case, Nile had to be present for the examination as well as to give permission for treatment.  He’d worked with Dr. Grisha Jaeger, Eren’s father, before, so he knew Levi was in very good hands.

 

Before Nile left to go to the senate building, Grisha gave his official report.  “Well, you heard for yourself what people, including his parents and classmates have been doing to him.  It’s abuse on a level I can’t even imagine.  It’s the most disturbing case I’ve ever seen.  X-rays showed a number of broken but healed bones, along with a few ribs that are freshly cracked, and his left arm which is only partially healed.  At least it’s healing correctly.  He has 32 new whip lashes across his back that are about a week old but has scars from countless more.  He also has a severe contusion on the back of his head and a large number of large scrapes and cuts from a fall down some stairs last night.  Most of the cuts were not deep, but two were deep enough to require 15 stitches in all.  Then, of course, there’s the bruising and the burn from the rope he tried to hang himself with.   I don’t see any permanent damage, but his throat’s going to be sore and his voice raspy for at least a week.”

 

“Thank God your son found him in time,” Nile commented as he read through the report.  “What worries me is the psychological damage.”

 

“I have Dr. Rico Brzenska in talking with him now.   She’s the best there is, but it’s going to take time,” Grisha responded. 

 

“It says here in the report that high doses of estrogen have been found in his blood?” Nile questioned.

 

“Well, I guess it was part of how his parents tried to make him into a girl.   He’s been unknowingly on estrogen for many years.  He said his parents started making him take ‘vitamins’ that likely included a few forms of estrogen replacement.  The result is that this severe hormone imbalance has hindered his development.  Effectively, he hasn’t gone through puberty yet.  I mean, how many 16-year-old boys haven’t masturbated at least once?”

 

Nile huffed.  “None.  Most do it at least once per day . . . or at least I did as a teen,” he said with an embarrassed reddening of his face.

 

“Me too,” Grisha admitted.  “This one says he never had and wouldn’t know how.  Normal I’d call him a liar, but with that estrogen level, it’s likely he couldn’t even get an erection.  My wife and I will be taking him in, so without those supplements, he should go through puberty within the next year sometime.  At this point, I can only watch and hope that the damage is not permanent.”

 

“Well, thank you for all your help.  Eren seems to think very highly of the boy, so he should do well in your home,” Nile said as he turned to leave.  “I’ll be checking in on him in a couple of days.”

 

As Grisha turned to go back into the exam room, Eren came out.  “Dad, can we talk?  Someplace private?”

 

“Of course,” Grisha said, leading Eren to an empty private waiting room.  “What’s on your mind?” he asked as he closed the door.

 

Eren fiddled nervously with the hem of his t-shirt.  “Remember how I told you I was in love with Levinia?”

 

“Yes.  I remember.”

 

“Well . . . um . . . I’m still in love with him.”

 

Grisha smiled at his son.  “That’s good, Son.  Honestly, I would have been a little disappointed if your feelings had changed.  If they had, it would have meant you really didn’t love Levi in the first place.”

 

“Sooooo . . . you’re not mad that I love a boy?” Eren asked cautiously.

 

Grisha broke out laughing.  “Of course not!  You know what my mother always says.  ‘You can’t help who you fall in love with’.  Love is blind, right?  It doesn’t see skin color, or shape, or even gender.  I’m very proud of you for acting as you did, and for loving him when he needs it most.  I’m proud of you for loving who he is rather than what he is.”  He then hugged his son.  “I’m so very proud of you, Eren.  And I’m so glad you feel you can confide in me.  Never forget, that your father loves you for who you are.”

 

Eren felt almost giddy.  “Thanks, Dad.  Thanks for understanding.  Think Mom’ll understand too?”

 

Grisha patted the boy on the back.  “I’m sure she will.  I just need to finish up a few things here, then I’ll take you and Levi home.  I hope you don’t mind sharing your room with him.  With all of your grandparents here, we don’t have any spare rooms at the moment.”

 

Eren beamed.  “Of course, I don’t mind!”

 

“No hanky panky,” Grisha immediately told him, and at Eren’s surprised and open-mouthed blush continued.  “I mean it.  Right now, that boy is in no condition to be having sex.  Chances are it will be up to a year before he can.”

 

“Okay.  Just having him with me is enough.  Hadn’t really even thought of having sex, to be honest.  I’ve been too busy trying to earn his love first.”  Eren was turning about a dozen shades of red.

 

“Alright, Son.  I trust you.  But when you do decide to have sex, for pity’s sake use a condom!”

 

“DAD!”

 

* * *

 

 

Later that evening, Nile Dawk finally got his turn to address the state senate regarding the anti bullying law.  “Ladies and Gentlemen,” he started, as if he were conducting a press conference.  “Today, at 12:18 pm, in room 418 of the Rose Building at Sina High School in Shiganshina, a sixteen-year-old boy hung himself.”  A murmur went through the room.  Nile continued now that he had everyone’s undivided attention.  “Luckily, another student found him and cut him down before it was too late.  Unlike most suicides, this individual left a note describing why he was taking this course of action.  I will read it to you now, changing the names to protect the innocent.”

 

“To Whom It May Concern;

 

I know how much everyone hates it when someone kills themselves with no explanation, so I’m leaving this note to explain my actions to whomever finds me.

Legally, my name is Jane, a girl, sixteen years of age.  That’s what everyone knows me by.  As you can see, however, I am NOT a girl.  That was my parents’ idea.  I never wanted to be a girl.  I lived my whole life as a girl, but I die a boy.  You needn’t bother telling my parents what happened, because they don’t care.  Mother is finally having a REAL girl, so I’m not needed anymore.  There is no one to miss me and no one to care.  I make everyone around me miserable.  Just ask my former classmates or read the notes in the girls’ bathroom.  I apologize for making everyone so unhappy, and I thank them for putting up with me all these years.  I’m sorry I couldn’t be the kind of daughter that Mother and Father could be proud of.  I won’t disappoint anyone anymore.

Please tell Bob that I’m so sorry for deceiving him.  He was always so kind to me, but he really does deserve someone better; a real girl.

I apologize to the person that has to clean up any mess my death may cause.  This was the cleanest way I could think of.  I hope you won’t be emotionally scarred by finding my body.  I’m sorry and I know it’s selfish, but this really is best for everyone.

Thank you and goodbye

I’m sorry.

 

John

 

P.S. If it’s not too much trouble, I’d like John on my grave marker (If I get one) instead of Jane.  Thank you.”

 

Silence filled the chamber as Nile finished reading and set the note down.  After a brief pause, he told the senate, “I don’t know about all of you, but I know that when I go home tonight, I am going to hug both of my children and tell them how much I love them and am proud of them.  I’m going to make sure they will always feel safe coming to me with **_any_** questions or problems they have.  I suspect many of you that have children or grandchildren will be doing the same.”

 

“This individual has faced bullying his entire life.  Not only from his own parents, but from his school mates as well.  The psychological abuse had him genuinely believing that he was a bad person and that everything was his fault.  There is writing on the walls of the girls’ room in Sina High School, that read ‘Jane is a loser’, ‘Jane should kill herself’ and ‘I will laugh when ‘Jane dies’.  Can any of you even imagine seeing that when you go into a public bathroom?  I sure as hell can’t.  Can you imagine one of your own children walking into a school bathroom and seeing something like that about themselves?  I pray you never find out.”

 

“How many of you parents in here have told your children the rhyme ‘Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names can never hurt me’?”  Hundreds of hands when up in the chambers, including Nile’s.  “I’m guilty of the same.  And I say guilty because that saying is wrong.  Words hurt more than any stick or stone ever could.  Words don’t hurt the body, but they wound the mind and the soul.”  Nile was becoming more and more passionate as he continued.

 

“Two things can happen when we tell our children that saying.  They accept bullying in silence, whether it is them or another that is being victimized, because they think it’s not really harmful, so they tell no one.  Some, however, will think that since words don’t hurt anybody, that it’s okay to say cruel things to others.  Both lead to bullying and no one doing anything to stop it.”

 

“A co-worker of mine did extensive research into bullying for a case she was working on.  These are a few of the statistics she found from multiple sources.  More than one out of every five students report being bullied.  The federal government began collecting data on school bullying in 2005, when the prevalence of bullying was around 28 percent.”

“Though rates may very across studies about bullying, a meta-analysis of 80 studies analyzing bullying involvement rates for 12-18-year-old students reported a mean prevalence rate of 35% for traditional bullying involvement and 15% for cyberbullying involvement.”

“64% of children who are bullied do not report it.  More than half of bullying situations stop when a peer intervenes on behalf of the student being bullied.  School-based bullying prevention programs decrease bullying by up to 25%.  The reasons for being bullied reported most often by students were looks, body shape, and race. 160,000 kids per day do not attend school for fear of being bullied according to the U.S. Department of Justice.”

 

“Students who experience bullying are at increased risk for poor school adjustment, sleep difficulties, anxiety, and depression.  Students who experience bullying are twice as likely as non-bullied peers to experience negative health effects such as headaches and stomachaches.  Youth who self-blame and conclude they deserved to be bullied are more likely to face negative outcomes, such as depression, prolonged victimization, and maladjustment.”

 

“There is a strong association between bullying and suicide-related behaviors, but this relationship is often overshadowed or dismissed by other factors, including depression, violent behavior, and substance abuse, all of which could themselves be a result of the bullying.  The false notion that suicide is a natural response to being bullied has the dangerous potential to normalize the response and thus create copycat behavior among youth.  Suicide is the third leading cause of death among young people, resulting in about 4,400 deaths per year, according to the CDC. For every successful suicide among young people, there are at least 100 suicide attempts.  Over 14% of high school students have considered suicide, and almost 7% have attempted it.  Bully victims are between 2 to 9 times more likely to consider suicide than non-victims, according to studies by Yale University.  A study in Britain found that at least half of suicides among young people are related to bullying.  Bully-related suicide can be connected to any type of bullying, including physical bullying, emotional bullying, cyberbullying, and sexting, or circulating suggestive or nude photos or messages about a person.”

 

“What this all boils down to is that bullying is a crime that breaks numerous laws ranging from slander to assault with a deadly weapon and even negligent homicide.  These kids that are bullying others are going to be out in the adult workforce in just a few years, where, if not shown now that this behavior is wrong and won’t be tolerated, will continue bullying behaviors with co-workers, neighbors and even strangers.  How many adult bullies do we all know?  I’d be willing to bet most if not all of them started off as bullies in school.”

 

“Furthermore, the victims will also be entering the workforce soon.  Their success may be hindered by low self esteem, depression and a myriad of social and mental disorders stemming from bullying.  We, as adults . . . as parents, need to stop this trend now.  It is our job to show our children that they need to take responsibility for the results of their words and actions.  We need to show them that bullying is wrong no matter what your age is.  ‘Oh, but they’re just children,’ is no longer an excuse.  Parents must also be held responsible for teaching their children that bullying is wrong.  We need to show that this form of abuse will NOT be tolerated under any circumstances.”

 

“Tell me, Ladies and Gentlemen.  How many more lives must be destroyed or ruined because we sit back and do nothing to stop bullying?   How many more people, of any age, have to cry themselves to sleep at night because they are bullied?  When are we gonna stop shaking our heads saying, ‘what a shame’ and actually DO something to put a stop to it?  You’re too late to save that sixteen-year-old boy from attempting suicide this afternoon.  I know you’re thinking, ‘well, he was abused at home,’.  I fail to see how that is an excuse to allow his tormenters to get away with bullying and making his life even worse.  After all, abuse is also a form of bullying, whether it is by a family member, classmate, co-worker or stranger.  Bullying made an already bad situation completely intolerable.  We need to take a stand now and prevent this from happening again!  What are we to tell future generations that face the same horrors this boy has faced if we don’t pass this law as it is right now?  It’s sad that we actually have to pass such a law, because parents refuse to teach their children about how wrong bullying is, or because children don’t have parents to teach them.  It’s sad that we have to make this law because teachers and parents are afraid to intervene.  This law won’t solve all problems associated with bullying.  But it’s a start.  We ** _HAVE_** to start somewhere, and this would be a very good start.  Thank you all for listening.”

 

Nile couldn’t believe he’d just given such a long and passionate speech, but he didn’t regret it one bit.  He nearly fell down the stairs off the podium when everyone in the room rose to their feet and applauded.

 

* * *

 

 

Levi had been given a spare set of Nurse’s scrubs to wear out of the hospital, since he no longer had clothes of his own.  He enjoyed the warm welcome he received from Eren’s mother, Carla Jaeger.  The smell of dinner cooking had his mouth instantly watering as his stomach growled loudly as he stepped into the Jaeger household for the first time.

 

“Well someone’s certainly hungry!” a boisterous old man exclaimed he came to greet the newcomer.  At first, Eren feared his grandfather would give Levi one of his signature, crushing bear hugs, but was relieved when the man only placed a hand gently on each of Levi’s shoulders and kissed each cheek.  “Welcome to the madhouse!”

 

The poor boy was more than a little overwhelmed by the enthusiastic greetings he received from all four of Eren’s grandparents.  Carla’s mother was Turkish and her father (whom Levi had just met) was Greek.  Grisha’s father was German, and his mother was half German and half Norwegian.   Levi was greeted happily by all four before Grisha shooed them away.  “Give the boy some space.  He’s had a very long day,” he told them.  “Eren, why don’t you show Levi around and help him get settled?”

 

“Sure, Dad,” Eren replied.  “Welp, the downstairs kinda speaks for itself.  Living room, dining room, rec room and kitchen all rolled into one giant mega room.  Couldn’t get away with anything when I was little, cuz Mom could see me know matter what she was doing down here,” he chuckled.  “There is a half bath under the stairs, and a coat closet in the mudroom by the back door and there’s also a sunroom back there.”  He led Levi up the open stairs into the second floor.  “Okay.  So.  Mom and Dad have the master suite down at the end of the hall.  The laundry room is on our left and the bathroom on the right.  Then come the two guest rooms where my grandparents are currently staying, and finally there’s Dad’s study in the round front room.”

 

“Now for the totally awesome part.  Remember the turret on the front of the house?  Follow me.”  Eren led him through a door that was right next to the study’s door and up a flight of stairs.  The entire top floor of the turret had been converted into Eren’s bedroom, complete with his own bathroom.  The room was of contemporary décor with soft cool grey walls and simple white curtains over black light blocking Roman shades.  In stark contrast were the dark hardwood floors and ceiling that reveled the peak of the roof and had a skylight on the back side.  There was a sleek, modern curved desk under one of the windows with a lamp, laptop and several books on it.  There was a large, simple wardrobe, a matching dresser and night stands as well as two comfortable gray chairs.  Floating shelves displayed soccer trophies and a few odds and ends Eren had been given over the years. 

 

On the wall across from the simple blue and grey dressed bed with its tufted grey headboard, was a 46-inch tv with a game console and blu-ray player on a floating shelf below.  Levi couldn’t stop his jaw dropping.

 

“Mom, Dad and I worked on this a few years back,” Eren explained proudly.  “We did all the work ourselves . . . well except for the plumbing, electrical and insulation.  All the woodwork, painting, tiling in the bathroom, even my bed and headboard, we did ourselves over the course of a year.  Mom and I made that desk over there.  I was kinda bummed when it was done.  It was really fun working on it together, but it turned out great!” 

 

He grabbed Levi’s hand and pulled him over to the door in the only flat wall in the room.  On the other side was a bathroom.  The floor and wall tiles were the color of sand, and the custom shower in one corner had multi blue mosaic tile accents and a simple brown, tan and beige block shower curtain on a curved rod.  The opposite corner had shelves with towels and supplies on them, and the sink was a turquoise glass bowl on a beige counter and dark brown vanity with the faucet sticking out directly from the wall behind it. 

 

“Holy shit,” Levi gasped in awe.  “This is incredible!”  He then noticed his reflection in the mirror above the sink and groaned, reaching up to touch his crudely chopped off hair.  It was made worse by the fact that the hospital staff had shaved a couple of places to gain access to cuts.

 

Eren noticed.  “Hey, if you’re willing to trust me, I think I can fix that for you.”

 

“You sure?  I’d really appreciate it.  Nothing feminine, though.”

 

Eren chuckled.  “Of course not.  I think I know a way to work with those shaved spots.”  He grabbed the dark wooden stool/step ladder from beside the sink and had Levi sit down.  He then collected an electric razor and a pair of scissors from a drawer in the vanity.  He then ran his fingers through the silken ebony.  “Wow . . . it’s even softer than I imagined,” he commented, receiving an instant blush from Levi.  “And you have this perfect, off-center part.  Not like mine that just goes every which way no matter what I do.”

 

Levi sat still, blushing like mad, while Eren worked.  He felt the tickle of the razor buzzing up through the hair on the lower half of his skull as Eren created an undercut that blended in with the areas that had already been shaved.  Eren then trimmed and evened out the hair on top.  He stood back to examine his work, after running his hands through the black silk several times just for the heck of it.  “Wow,” Eren finally smiled.  “That came out even better than I’d expected.  You’re friggin HOT!”

 

Levi’s blush deepened.  He turned to look in the mirror and was shocked by what he saw.  For the first time in his life, it wasn’t a girl staring back at him.  Tears formed in his eyes.

 

“Wait, you don’t like it?” Eren questioned worriedly.

 

“No, I love it,” Levi whispered.  “I’ve just never seen myself as a guy before.  I’ve always wondered what I’d look like.”

 

“Karma’s a real bitch.  Every girl that’s made fun of you is going to be pulling their hair out because they’re all gonna wanna date you.  I can’t wait to see you turn them down,” Eren stated.  “I always did like Karma.”

 

Levi actually smirked.  “That would be rather satisfying.  Not very nice; but satisfying.  But I wouldn’t want to hurt their feelings . . . wait . . .”  The color drained from his face.  “What is everyone in school going to think when they find out?  I wasn’t exactly planning on being alive to worry about it.”

 

“Relax, Levi,” Eren replied.  “It’ll be fine.  If I know Jean, he’ll say something completely tacky like ‘Welcome to the brotherhood of man’.”

 

Levi chuckled.  “He will not.”

 

“He will,” Eren insisted.  “Probably word for word, too.  Too bad we have to wait until Tuesday to find out.  Let me cover up those stitches so you can shower.  It’ll feel good to get all the hair pricklies off.  I’ll be in the other room if you need anything, okay?”

 

“But . . . what am I supposed to wear?”

 

“Oh, right.  Hmmm.  You’re a lot smaller than me, but I think I have some jersey bottoms and a t-shirt that should fit well enough for now.  The bottoms have a string to tie them, so they won’t fall.  I’ll go get them.”

 

The warm shower felt wonderful.  It was nice to not have to wash long hair; even nicer to not have to shave his legs.  He discovered that he had to roll up the pant legs several times so as not to trip on them.  Eren had kindly included safety pins so the cuffs would stay in place.  It was difficult to keep the t-shirt from falling off one shoulder or the other.  As he truly looked at himself for the first time, he noted that he was, in fact, much too thin.  That was when he finally noticed the smell of dinner wafting up into the room. 

 

Eren led him back down to the dining table, where the large family was just sitting down to dinner.  Levi sat beside Eren and marveled at all the food on the table.  “Mom is a professional cook and always makes totally awesome meals, but when any of my grandparents are here, they make sure we eat like kings.  I’m pretty sure they are trying to make me fatter than Santa Claus,” Eren told him.

 

Levi chuckled.  “Now who’s worried about getting fat?”

 

“I sure wouldn’t mind, if it meant eating like this every day!” Eren replied.  “First, there’s a couple of German dishes; Saurbraten and Spatzel.  Then there’s the Greek dishes; Dolmadakia - stuffed grape leaves – they are to die for – and Choriatiki – REAL Greek salad, as in no disgusting lettuce.  Finally, the Turkish food; Mantı – fried pasta filled with meat and served with yogurt and spices – again, it’s to die for – and Pilav; Turks invented it, and the traditional way of making it is way better than the boxed shit and the stuff in most restaurants.”

 

“Watch your language,” Carla chided as she passed behind the boys to set a glass of milk before each of them.  For emphasis, she pinched Eren’s ear real hard.

 

“OWWWWW!  Sorry, Ma!!” Eren exclaimed.

 

In spite of all he’d been through that day, or perhaps **_because_** of what he’d been through, Levi’s appetite was far bigger than it usually was.  Eren hadn’t been kidding when he’d said how good the food was.  Levi had to concentrate on eating slowly and savoring the flavors.  Eren’s grandparents were highly energetic, and Levi found himself feeling tired just listening to them even though he found the stories of “the old countries” fascinating and amusing. 

 

Then, Carla’s father looked at Levi and commented, “Eren’s clothes are a might big on you, Son.  I have a marvelous idea.  Why don’t we all go on a family outing tomorrow to the mall and get this boy some clothes that fit!”

 

“Oh, that **_is_** a marvelous idea!” Grisha’s mother exclaimed.

 

“Agreed,” Grisha’s father chimed in.  “We can all chip in to get our new grandson a complete wardrobe!”

 

Grisha chuckled at his parents, then looked to Levi.  “Well, what do you say, Levi.  Feel up to a major shopping trip tomorrow?”

 

Levi was completely flabbergasted.  At first, he couldn’t even think, much less form an intelligible response.  After a few moments he responded, “But you shouldn’t!  You don’t owe me anything!  You shouldn’t feel you have to spend your money on me . . . I . . . I . . .”

 

“Levi,” Grisha started.  “I know we don’t **_have_** to spend anything on you, but Carla and I have taken you in by choice.  We chose to take responsibility for you because we wanted to, not because we had to.  I doubt you want to continue wearing the clothing your parents forced you to wear, so we will all gladly provide you with boys’ clothing and anything else you may need as well as some of what you want.”

 

“Never look a gift horse in the mouth,” Carla’s father stated.  “In Greece, it is an insult to not accept a gift.  But also, by refusing a gift, you are denying the giver the pleasure and blessing of giving to you.”

 

“Besides, dear, it will be such fun!” Carla’s mother exclaimed, to which both grandfathers and Grisha gave her rather dubious expressions.

 

“Yiayiá’s right,” Eren confirmed.  “It’ll be fun!  And I’ll be right there with you to keep Yiayiá* and Oma from overwhelming you.”

***YiaYia is Greek for Grandma, and Oma and Opa is German for Grandma and Grandpa**

“We’re not **_that_** bad, Eren!” Oma protested.

 

“Yes, you are, dear,” Opa agreed.

 

By the time dinner was finished, Levi was having trouble keeping his eyes open.  The day had been nothing less than completely exhausting.  It seemed like years ago that he’d tried to hang himself instead of hours. He was barely aware of saying goodnight to the family and Eren leading him up to the bedroom.  He was literally asleep before he ever touched the pillow.  He never felt Eren kiss his forehead and say, “Goodnight, Levi. I love you.”

 

The following day was an exhausting blur to Levi.  All he knew was that he ended up with seven pairs of jeans, three pairs of casual pants, one dress suit, five t-shirts, two polos, six button-ups, two hoodies, a winter coat, a denim jacket, boxers, briefs, undershirts, three pairs of jersey sleeping pants and three long sleeve t-shirts to match, socks, one pair of sneakers, one pair of boots and one pair of dress shoes.  At one point during the day, Eren disappeared while Oma and Yiayiá were trying to help him pick out a dress suit, Opa and Papa trying, unsuccessfully, to run interference for Levi.  It was Grisha that was finally able to get them to tone down their enthusiasm and whisked Levi away to the changing room where they could not follow.

 

As they finally left the store, Eren returned and handed Levi a big bag from the craft store.  “Here.  I got you a welcome to the family present.”

 

“You shouldn’t have,” Levi said quietly as he looked into the bag.  His eyes widened when he saw a notebook of sketch paper, a wood box of pencils, colored pencils and charcoals, two different size pads of pressed watercolor paper, several sized brushes and tubes of water color paint.  “It’s wonderful!  I’ve always wanted to try watercolor!  You remembered.  Eren.  Thank you.”  Tears formed at the corners of his eyes.  “This really means a lot to me.”

 

Eren smiled and hugged the boy.  “I’m glad you like it.  My only condition is that I get to see all your pictures and no death stuff.”

 

Levi chuckled and wiped away the tears.  “Deal.”

 

They had ice cream from the local dairy farm for supper that night before heading home.  Levi was surprised when Carla insisted on washing all the new clothes for him.  “You shouldn’t have to do my laundry,” the boy protested.  “I always wash my own clothes.  It’s not a big deal.”

 

“You’ve had a big day, sweetie.  You need to rest.  I always do all the laundry in the house anyway.  Like you said, it’s no big deal,” Carla countered.  “Tomorrow, you can start helping Eren with washing the dishes every night.”

 

“Yes, ma’am,” Levi replied.

 

“Ma’am?”  Carla giggled pleasantly.  “Oh, sweetie!   Just call me Carla.  I don’t like to think I’m old enough to be called, ‘ma’am’.”

 

* * *

 

 

If a bunch of teenagers or college kids playing Mario Kart was highly entertaining, then four old-world grandparents, two adults and two teenagers playing Mario Kart was flat out hilarious.  Sweet and gentle Carla became a hyper-competitive force to be reckoned with.  Opa & Papa never won due to being too busy trying to push each other off the road.  Oma, usually so quiet, became an excited cheerleader, cheering for everyone including herself.  Yiayiá, usually so boisterous, became quiet and focused, concentrating on what she was doing, and won the most frequently.  Eren, as competitive as his mother, did everything in his power to win, yelling about what he was doing the entire time.  Grisha, brilliant as a surgeon, was a terrible gamer and usually crashed with great frequency, always finishing dead last.  This left poor Levi just trying to not get run over.  It was a good thing he was already on the floor, because he would have fallen there when he passed Eren at the last moment of the last race and won.

 

“Wow, Levi!” Eren exclaimed.  “You got real good real fast!”

 

“I think he may be a natural,” Carla added.  “Guess we’ll have to watch out for him in the future.”

 

Levi grinned.  “I wouldn’t go that far.  But this has been really fun!”

 

“Right?” Eren agreed.  “Full family Mario Kart competitions are just as fun as with my friends.  It’s kinda hard to believe, but Yiayiá was the one that started this tradition two years ago!”

 

A short time later, dressed in his new, clean sleeping clothes, he climbed into bed.  He hadn’t really thought about it last night, but now he realized that this was Eren’s bed.  _He’s sharing his bed with me!_   Levi settled under the covers on his side.  Eren came out of the bathroom and got in to the other side of the bed and turned out the light.  Levi’s eyes widened, and he stiffened slightly when he felt an arm wrap around him from behind as Eren spooned against his back.  He felt a gentle kiss on the nape of his neck.  “I love you, Levi,” Eren told him. 

 

Levi relaxed.  “I love you, too, Eren.”

 

Waking up in the arms of another, safe and warm, was something that Levi could quickly get used to.  They had both slept so heavily that night, that they were still in the same position they’d fallen asleep in.  Eren’s arm was still draped around Levi’s torso, and his breath tickled Levi’s ear.  Still feeling deliciously sleepy, Levi placed his hand over Eren’s and dozed off again.  He woke up again he felt a kiss on his neck.   “M’rn’n,” he mumbled in response.

 

“Mornin’,” Eren answered as he smiled against Levi’s neck.  “I think I’m gonna really like waking up with you in my arms every morning.”

 

“Mmm,” Levi hummed.  “I think I’m gonna like it too.”

 

 “I don’t wanna get up, but I smell waffles,” Eren stated, still not moving.  “I really like waffles.  Mom makes the best waffles on the planet.  We use **_real_** maple syrup on special occasions.  We usually use berries and cream, but my grandparents being here means we get syrup today.”  Eren suddenly sat up.  “And it’s Sunday!  That means Yiayiá is making Turkish coffee!”  The brunette leapt from the bed and into the bathroom.

 

“Turkish coffee?” Levi asked sleepily as he sat up and rubbed his eyes.

 

“Yeah!  Totally worth getting up for!” Eren called back from the bathroom.  “She boils very finely ground coffee beans in water and a little bit of sugar in this special coffee pot called cezve, so that as soon as it begins to froth. She pours about one-third of the coffee into individual cups and the remaining amount is boiled to froth a second time before adding it to the first frothing already in the cups.  I like cream in mine, but most people drink it black.  You let the grounds settle to the bottom of the cup and then enjoy the smoothest, richest cup of coffee on the planet!”

 

Levi found Eren’s excitement over a cup of coffee to be highly amusing.  His chuckle turned into a soft groan as he lifted his still aching body from the bed.  He glanced at the clock.  _8:30am . . . I’ve been asleep for ten hours.  I’ve never slept more than five!  But why do I feel so tired still?  Shouldn’t I be feeling awake and refreshed after such a great night’s sleep?_   His body felt like lead as he pulled on a pair of jeans and a long-sleeve t-shirt. 

 

“Levi, are you feeling alright?” Eren asked him when they reached the bottom of the stairs.  “You look a little paler than usual, and you have really dark circles around your eyes.  Did you not sleep last night?  Did I move around to much?  Was I snoring?  Did I – mph!”

 

The small raven was chuckling as he placed a hand over Eren’s mouth.  “Come up for air,” he said.  “And I slept like a dead thing last night.  If you moved or snored, I was unaware of it.  I just still feel really tired.  I don’t know why.”

 

“You should tell Dad.”

 

“Tell me what?” Grisha asked as he passed them on the way to the dining table.

 

“I slept at least ten hours last night, but I feel so heavy and tired this morning,” Levi explained.

 

Grisha came over, placed the back of his hand against Levi’s forehead, then his cheek.  “Hm.  No fever.  You do look awfully pale.  Let me run a blood test before you eat breakfast.  You may be anemic.  I’ll check your blood sugar too.  Come to my office.”

 

Levi followed the doctor into his basement office and sat down in the chair that Grisha indicated.  He looked away as Grisha pulled up his left sleeve, cleaned the inside of his elbow with an alcohol swab and then stuck the tiny needle into a vein.  After drawing a vial of blood and marking it for testing, he pressed a gauze pad to the prick and taped it down.  He placed a small drop of the blood into an automated cell counter.  He frowned at the results.

 

“Well, you’re definitely anemic.  Chances are it’s due to the consistent loss of blood due to the frequent injuries your parents inflicted on you.  I’m afraid we may have over done it yesterday with the shopping, which is also contributing to your tiredness.  I’m going to put you on an iron supplement that has folic acid and vitamin C in it.  I’m also going to put you on a men’s multi vitamin.  You’re going to have to rest today; no strenuous activity and lots of fluids.  I’m going to contact the school and let them know you won’t be in until Wednesday.  Now, how about we go get breakfast?”

 

Levi nodded enthusiastically, and his stomach growled loudly in response.

 

It was the best breakfast Levi had ever eaten.  He’d never had waffles or syrup before, and they were like heaven to him.  Eren loved watching the boy’s face as he tried the hot, buttery and syrupy waffle.  The moan that followed that first bite was music to Eren’s ears.  _I’m gonna spend the rest of my life showing Levi new things and experiences just so I can see that look and hear his reactions every time,_ he thought, grinning ear to ear.

 

Eren had been right about the coffee too.  It was strong, rich and wonderful.  Levi felt bad that he was only allowed a taste and not a whole cup.  “Coffee is a diuretic.  You need to take fluids in, not pee fluids out,” Grisha told him.

 

“Grisha!  Not at the table!” Carla chided in mock horror.

 

“Oh please, Carla,” Papa scolded.  “He just said ‘pee’.  It’s not like he said ‘piss’ at the table.”

 

“PAPA!” Carla yelped.

 

Eren burst out laughing and Levi followed suit.  Yiayiá whacked the man up the back of his head.  “Poú eínai ta charísmatá sou, papá? Anatrápikes se énan achyróna?” ******

          ****Greek:  Where are your manners, papa?  Were you raised in a barn?**

 

* * *

 

 

Sunday, Monday & Tuesday were long and boring days.  Levi was torn between wanting to get back to school so he wouldn’t be bored, and terrified of returning to school and facing his tormentors with his new identity.  He finally drummed up the courage to contact his cousin, Petra.  She was aware of what was going on through her mother (Levi’s mother’s sister) when Levi’s parents had been arrested Friday night for child abuse.

 

“Are you happy being a boy?” Petra asked him tearfully after he’d told her the entire story.

 

Levi sniffled, wiping away his own tears.  “Yes.  I’m finally allowed to be who I really want to be.  Is it . . . is it wrong that I like Eren but still want to be a boy myself?”

 

“Of course not, Levi!  There are lots of men that prefer other men.  There are even more people who like both men **_and_** women,” Petra assured him.  “There’s a couple of girls at my school that are together.  One definitely prefers girls and the other likes both boys and girls.  There’s nothing wrong with loving anyone, regardless of sex.  It’s just human.”

 

“Thanks, Petra.”

 

They talked for hours.  Even after they hung up, the texted frequently, finally allowed to reconnect and catch up on each other’s lives after years of being separated. 

 

* * *

 

 

Wednesday morning inevitably arrived and, ready or not, Levi returned to school.  Carla dropped the boys off in front of the high school, telling Levi to call her if he needed anything or needed to come home.  She and Grisha had already explained what was going on to Principal Pixis and all of Levi’s teachers.  Records were updated to reflect his new name and preparations were made to explain about Levi to the other students **_if_** necessary.

 

The new anti-bullying legislation had been passed with an overwhelming majority vote.  Even as Eren and Levi stepped out of the car in front of the school, the bill was being signed into law.  The law was retroactive back one full year, and Pixis was ready.  He had all of the reports that two of Levi’s teachers had kept over the past year on the abuse they had witnessed.  He also had questioned both Eren and Jean along with other students about the bullying they had witnessed.  None of the students were aware of what a long day this was going to be. 

 

Eren paused on his way inside and turned to see Levi still standing back at the curb, unmoving.  He walked back over to his boyfriend.  “Hey.  Come on.  We don’t wanna be late,” he said gently.

 

“I don’t know, Eren.  What is everyone gonna say when they see me?”

 

“Something to the effect of, ‘Oh my gawd!  He’s so hot!’  They’ll never guess that you were Levinia.  You look so different.”  It was true.  Levi’s once long hair was now short and undercut.  Instead of a skirt and blouse, he wore a pair of black jeans and a grey button-up shirt under his warm, black coat, a pair of black sneakers and a dark grey scarf around his neck, hiding the marks created by the rope.  His voice was different as well since he was no longer trying to feminize it.  “Trust me, Levi.  You’ve got nothing to worry about.  Besides, Jean and me will be looking out for you.”

 

In the mean time, several students had walked by without giving Levi so much as a second glance, too wrapped up in their own affairs.  No one ‘accidentally’ bumped into him or said anything cruel.  He suddenly felt blissfully invisible.  Taking in a deep breath, he said, “Right.  Let’s go.” 

 

As they reached Eren’s locker, Jean came striding towards them with a big, goofy grin on his face.  He grabbed Levi’s hand and shook it vigorously, placing his other hand carefully on the smaller boy’s shoulder.  “Welcome to the brotherhood of man, Levi!”

 

Levi’s eyes widened, and his mouth fell open, and Eren groaned while he face-palmed.  “Holy mother of Sina!  He actually said it word for word just like you said he would!” Levi exclaimed.

 

“I know.  I knew he would, but I still can’t believe he did,” Eren groaned.

 

“Wait.  What?” Jean asked in confusion.  “What’d I do?”

 

“Welcome to the brotherhood of man? . . . geez, Jean.  Could you **_be_** any cheesier?” Eren asked.

 

Jean scowled at his best friend.  “Hey!  So, I’m a cheesy guy!  Cheese makes the world go ‘round.”

 

Levi started walking away.  “That’s it.  I’m out.  You two enjoy your cheese fest.”  He headed for his first class.

 

“Hey!  Wait up, bro!” Jean called and ran after him while Eren just stood by his locker laughing.

 

Levi managed to keep his face expressionless as he entered the classroom in spite of every student’s eyes on him.  Whispers immediately filled his ears.

 

“Wow!  I didn’t know we had a new student starting.”

 

“He’s so cute!”

 

“Cute?  He friggin hot!”

 

“I think I’m in love!”

 

 _I don’t believe it.  Eren was right.  They have no idea!_   He stopped by his desk and glanced around at all the faces staring at him.   He scowled slightly.  “What?  You’ve never seen a new student before?” he growled.  _Holy shit!  When did I develop such an attitude?  Is really all just because I’m finally allowed to be me; to be a guy?  Is this really just because I look different?  It’s as if Levinia really did die and I arose in her place – like phoenix rising from the ashes._

 

Still frowning, he started to sit down.  “Wait!  You don’t want to sit there!” Kyla yelped.

 

Raising a slender eyebrow, he looked at her.  “Why not?”

 

“That’s Levinia’s desk.”

 

Levi looked around the room.  “It’s the only empty desk in the room.  I don’t think she’ll mind, since she’s obviously not here.”  He started to sit again.

 

“WAIT!  You . . . don’t want to use that chair,” Kyla warned.

 

Levi raised an eyebrow at her again.   Then his eyes narrowed, and he raised his backpack high over the chair and dropped it.  The chair collapsed under the impact.  _REALLY?!  These assholes are still using this old trick?  What is wrong with them?  Well, I have my wings now.  Time to fly._   He glared at Kyla, and she at least had the decency to look ashamed.  “Really?” he asked with barely contained anger.

 

“It’s just Levinia.  It’s not like she matters,” Kyla replied.  

 

“It was just a joke,” the boy in the desk behind Levi defended.

 

“A joke?” Levi repeated.  “You think it’s funny to hurt and humiliate another human being?”

 

The boy flinched and visibly swallowed under Levi’s glare.  _Wow!  I can’t believe I have this in me!  Where’d all this courage and anger come from?  Why am I so suddenly not making excuses for them?  Why am I not blaming myself?  Is just five days with Eren’s family what changed me?  I think I like this._  

 

Levi spun to glare down at Kyla.  “Get up.”

 

She looked like a deer in the headlights.  “What?”

 

“Stand. Up.”

 

He grabbed her chair as soon as she’d stood, then kicked his broken one over to her.  “You think it’s so funny, you can use that chair.”  With that, he finally sat down.  Kyla stood by her desk, her mouth hanging open in shock and indignation as the whole class sang “Oooooooooh~”.  Jean just sneered at her.  _Serves the bitch right,_ Jean thought.

 

Mr. Flagon entered the room just as the bell rang.  He was looking forward to today.  It was the day he’d been waiting for since the school year began and he first had Levi as a student.  “Alright everyone.  Take a seat and quiet down.” 

 

Kyla stood there, not knowing what to do.  No one had ever challenged her before.  “Miss Kendrick, please take a seat.”

 

“B-broken,” she stammered.

 

“Excuse me?”

 

“My chair.  It’s broken.”  Several students tried unsuccessfully to suppress giggles. 

 

“Well that’s a switch,” Flagon stated in amusement.  “Usually it was Levinia’s chair that was broken.  Very well, Miss Kendrick.  Get a chair from the back of the room.”

 

“But . . .”

 

Flagon sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose.  “Fine.  Get one from across the hall.”

 

After he had taken attendance, Flagon made an announcement.  “As you are all no doubt already aware, we have a new student with us today.  His name is Levi and I would appreciate it if you all would make him feel welcome.  Also, there will be a school assembly at the end of this period.  Attendance is mandatory.  Levi, Principal Pixis has requested that you go see him in the office.  I’ll excuse you now.”

 

Levi, with butterflies in his stomach, nodded, grabbed his bag and left.  He encountered the eccentric, bald principal in the hall long before he reached the office.  “Ah, Levi!  Good!  I was just coming to go get you.  Please, come to the office.  We have much to discuss.”

 

“Yes, sir.”  Levi followed the man to his office and was surprised to see two police officers, Detective Dawk, Dr. Brzenska and another man he didn’t recognize.

 

“Levi, you already know Detective Dawk and Dr. Brzenska.  This old fart here is Henry Smith, the head of the Child Welfare department.  His son, Erwin is the student council president.”

 

Levi felt what little color he possessed drain from his already pale face as Mr. Smith shook his hand.  “It’s a pleasure to meet you,” Mr. Smith told him.  Levi could only nod in response.  He wasn’t sure he wanted to know what this was all about.

 

“Have a seat, everyone,” Pixis commanded.

 

Levi settled in a chair with Dr. Rico Brzenska protectively on his left and Detective Nile Dawk on his right.  “Don’t worry, Levi,” Rico assured him as she rubbed his hand, who’s knuckles were already white from gripping the arm of the chair so tightly.  “Everything’s going to be fine.”

 

“That’s right,” Pixis confirmed.  “First of all, I want you to know that the new Anti-Bullying Law was signed and became official just a few minutes ago.  This means that we can now legally go after the kids who have been bullying you.  You see, the law is retroactive by one year, so we can now prosecute people for everything they have done to you since this time last year.  You may not know this, but two of your teachers have been keeping track of what students have been saying and doing to you this school year.  Until today, however, there was nothing we could legally do about it unless you asked for help.”

 

“That’s right,” Smith agreed.  “Not only does the law allow the schools to take action, but it also allows the state to take legal action against the perpetrators, and in the cases of minors, their parents as well.  Bullying of any kind will no longer be tolerated.  We can even take action against verbal and cyber abuse, as well as physical and sexual.”

 

“Based on the evidence provided by witnesses,” Nile continued as he handed Levi a sheet of paper.  “We have been given warrants to arrest the students on this list.  I would like to you look it over and tell us if we are missing someone or if there is someone here that shouldn’t be.”

 

Levi’s head was reeling.  It was all too much to take in.  He looked over the surprisingly long list.  Kyla was right at the top.  After several minutes, Levi spoke.  “Isabel Magnolia doesn’t belong on this list.  She follows Kyla around everywhere, but she never said or did anything to me.  She never even laughed.  She was just there.”

 

Nile took the list back and crossed off the name.  “Very well.  I’ll get the warrant cancelled.  Is there anyone else?”

 

Levi shook his head.

 

“Well then,” Pixis said.  “The assembly today is to announce the new law and this school’s stand on the issues of bullying.  After the assembly is when the students on that list will be arrested.  Now, Levi, I am giving you the option to skip the assembly if you so choose.  It will not be easy for you to hear since I will be citing your case specifically.  I won’t be using your name at all, but most students will no doubt know to whom I am referring.   Thus, I am willing to excuse you from the assembly.”

 

Levi thought it over for several moments, his silver eyes wide and his breaths quick and short.  “I . . . I think . . .”

 

“Perhaps you could sit backstage,” Rico suggested.  “That way you can leave without being noticed if you need to.”

 

Levi nodded.  “Yeah.  Can I have Eren and Jean back there with me?”

 

“Of course,” Pixis replied.  “If you need to leave the assembly at any time, just go ahead and do so.  Carla Jaeger is aware of what is going on today, so if you need to go home, just let someone know before you leave.  Okay?”

 

“Yes, sir.  Thank you.”

 

* * *

 

 

Principal Pixis had not been kidding when he’d said his speech would be difficult to listen to.  Levi sat on a sofa backstage that was being used in the drama club’s next play, between Eren and Jean, his knees drawn up under his chin and fighting back tears while his two friends comforted him. 

 

Pixis’ usual smile was not present as he stepped up to the podium and cleared his throat.  The students seemed oblivious to his subtle attempt to get their attention and continued their noisy chatter.  Pixis stepped back from the microphone, took in a deep breath and shouted, “ATTEEEEEEEEENTION!”  The following silence was deafening.  “That’s better,” Pixis stated as he stepped back up to the microphone.  “This mandatory assembly has been called to address a serious problem at this school.  I find it highly disturbing that even after all of the assemblies, classes and announcements about the harm bullying does and how wrong it is to bully others, bullying is still rampant at this school.  Equally bad is the fact that even though you may not be actually participating in bullying activities, you say and do nothing to try to stop it when you see it.  Worse still, a large number of the faculty, whose responsibility it is to guide and protect our students also say and do nothing about it.  That is about to change.”

 

“This morning, at 7:30am, a new bill was signed into law that makes bullying illegal.  Anyone caught bullying, whether verbal, physical or written, will be punished according to the law.  It will go on your permanent school and criminal records.  Cases of physical or sexual bullying will result in arrest.  Depending on the severity of the bullying, I won’t hesitate to issue detention, suspension and expulsion.  School community service will also be used as retribution.  As of this moment, kids, bullying of any kind will NOT be tolerated at this school.  I don’t care if a student is on school grounds or not.  If you are being bullied by anyone, be it another student, a stranger or a family member, report it to a member of our faculty and we will go to bat for you and put a stop to it.”

 

“If I sound rather angry at all of you, it’s because I am; angry, disappointed and saddened.”  True enough, there was no mistaking the anger in the old man’s voice.  “Last Friday, a student of this school tried to hang herself.  She was abused at home and constantly bullied here at school.  She was an excellent student and, according to her teachers, quiet and kind.  Yet, every day she was tormented both verbally and physically by her fellow students.  She was pushed in the hallways, books thrown from her hands and desk, chairs loosened so they’d break when she sat, told she was useless and should kill herself, and there are notes in the bathrooms saying the same.  Frankly, kids, I am beyond ashamed of all of you for conducting yourselves in such an immature, cruel and uncaring manner.” 

 

“Faculty, I am also ashamed of many of you for allowing this to continue without saying anything at all.  I understand that until now that our ability to intervene has been limited, but to not even report the bullies or try talking to them or their parents about their intolerable behavior is inexcusable.  At the very least, detention should have been issued to the offenders.  All of this resulted in an innocent girl trying to end her own life.  Each and every one of you is responsible for her actions on Friday.  You, the people who tormented her and the ones who saw it but did nothing to try to stop it, are effectively guilty of attempted  negligent homicide.”

 

“The sad thing is, that those of you who bullied her, and you know who you are, are sitting there right now still thinking you’ve done nothing wrong.  You still think it was okay to abuse another human being.  You actually think you were justified in your actions.  Some of you think that it was just words and words can’t hurt anyone.  Well, I have news for you; it’s never okay to abuse anyone for any reason.  There’s never justification for tearing another person down.  Words can be even more harmful than a fist.”

 

“This is going to sound cliché but put yourselves in her shoes.  If someone were to start calling you ‘worthless’ or ‘loser’ or pushing you in the hallways or hitting you, you would be angry and hurt.  You would scream bloody murder and demand punishment for your tormentor.  So, what is it that makes you think it’s okay for you to be the tormentor?  Tell me.  Are you really that stupid?”

 

“I will not allow this to happen again.  This new Anti-Bullying Law means we can now take action against the bullies and their parents for allowing it.  **_Bullying will not be tolerated_**.  From now on, this school will be a safe zone.  Any and all bullying received and/or witnessed is to be reported to a member of the faculty.  The faculty has already been given standard procedures to follow when a bullying incident is reported.  We are here to help and protect all of you.”

 

“Those of you who are guilty of bullying others, I want you to think long and hard about your actions.  From now on, bullying is a criminal activity and will be dealt with accordingly.  You will now have to face the consequences of your actions.  You will have to deal with having this stain on both your school and your criminal record.  I’ll have you know that most colleges frown on students with a history of bullying.  If you insist on making life miserable and difficult for others, then you will have to live with the result of your actions.  Bullies don’t go easy on their victims, so we will **_not_** go easy on bullies. **_Bullying. Will. Not. Be. Tolerated._** ”

 

“Bullying is a habit that often carries into adulthood and into the workplace.   I intend to put a stop to it here in school.  I intend to break this evil habit here and now.  **_Bullying. Will. Not. Be. Tolerated._**   School is meant to prepare children for adulthood; not just academically, but socially as well.  Bullying is not socially acceptable.  It is wrong.  It is criminal.  It is harmful to both the bully and the victim.  **_Bullying. Will. Not. Be. Tolerated._**   Ever.  This is a new era, people.  There are no excuses anymore.  ‘Oh, but they’re just children,’ is no longer a reason to let bullying continue.  They’re still just children, so it’s the perfect time to teach them that **_bullying will not be tolerated_**.”

 

“I refuse to allow another student suffer to the point of trying to kill themselves.  This new law is retroactive to one year ago.  A couple of teachers and students, kept note of each case of bullying they witnessed since the beginning of this school year; especially involving the case of the suicide attempt victim.  As such, the following students will remain behind in their seats when I dismiss the assembly:  Kyla Kenrick, Thomas Brennan, Steven Patrick, Kimberly Riker, Jennifer Hopkins, Maria Sanchez, Eric Connor, Milo Farnsworth, Jackson McKenzie, Anna Larkin, Seth Farr, Jenna Cleef, Barbara Jenkins, Parker Jones, Celia Capstone, Jackson Creed, James Harper, Katie Packard and Joseph Vallencourt.  The remainder of the students will now return to your regular classes.”  Pixis turned and left the stage without another word, while a stunned student body got up and left the hall with unusual silence.

 

Backstage, Levi sat with his face buried in his knees, crying softly while Eren and Jean held him.  Rico sat in a folding chair in front of him, gently rubbing his forearms wrapped around his shins.  Pixis was a little surprised to see Levi still there.  “I’m impressed,” the man stated.  “I’m not sure I’d’ve been able to sit through that were I in your shoes.”

 

Levi looked up at the principal, tears running down his flushed face.  “Are they really going to be punished?”

 

“Yes, Levi.  They are being arrested and their parents notified as we speak.”  Pixis knelt down beside Rico and placed a hand on Levi’s shoulder.  “Listen.  It’s going to be okay.  Probably not today, or tomorrow, or even next week; but someday, it will be okay.  You will get through this.  You’re not alone.  You have a lot of people, including me, on your side fighting for you.  So, don’t give up again, okay?”

 

Levi choked out a sob and nodded.  “Good boy,” Pixis said.  “I’ll let you decide if you want to continue with the day or if you’d rather go home.”

 

* * *

 

 

An hour later, after having pulled himself together, Levi chose to return to his classes.  He heard the hushed whispers about his attempt to hang himself and what had been said at the assembly.  Thankfully, they still had no idea that he was the one they once knew as Levinia.  He managed to keep his expression neutral, or ‘scary resting bitch face’ as Jean called it, resulting in a faint smile and chuckle from Levi, who decided he liked the description.

 

Levi was completely shocked when Isabel, the girl he’d told Nile to remove from the arrest list, approached him while he was researching for a term paper in the library during lunch.  “Um, Levi, can I talk to you, please?” she asked quietly.

 

Levi glanced coldly up at her.  “I guess.  What do you want?”

 

“Um.  I want to apologize.”

 

“For . . .?”

 

“I haven’t told anyone, and I won’t either, but I know you’re Levinia.  I watched Kyla hurt and harass you, and I did nothing to stop her,” Isabel whispered.  “I was such a coward.  I was afraid she’d go after me if I stood up for you.”  Tears began to run from her brilliant teal-green eyes.  “I’m so sorry, Levi.  I’m sorry for being such a gutless coward and letting you get hurt.  I’m sorry I didn’t say anything to the teachers about it.”  A soft sob escaped her throat.  “Oh, god, I’m so sorry you tried to kill yourself!  It’s my fault for not saying anything!”

 

Levi swallowed hard, holding back tears of his own.  It was a full minute before he could talk.  “Thank you for the apology.  It really means a lot to me.  But, it’s not **_all_** your fault.  A little bit, perhaps, but certainly not all.  I can’t say as I blame you for being afraid of her.  After all, I’m terrified of her.”

 

“But you stood up to her this morning!”

 

“That’s because I’m a different person now.  I’m not Levinia anymore.  It’s very empowering, I must admit.  It felt really good to put her in her place.”

 

Isabel smiled.  “I bet it did.  I kinda wonder why I always wanted to hang around her so much.”

 

“It’s only human,” Levi replied.  “We all want to be accepted and wanting to be accepted by someone who is the most popular is natural.  In the wild, it is to any animal’s advantage to be close to the top animal in the group.  It offers protection and privilege . . . sorry.  That’s my inner geek getting out.”

 

“That’s okay,” Isabel giggled.  “I’m really kinda jealous of how smart you are.  I can barely remember my own name half the time.”  The red-head fiddled nervously with her ponytail.  “Can we, um, be friends?  Please?  I think you’d be a much better friend than Kyla.”

 

Levi looked up into her green eyes with surprise.  “You really mean that?”

 

Isabel nodded.

 

Levi’s expression softened.  “Okay.  I’d like that, Isabel.”

 

Isabel’s expression instantly lit up like a firework show.  “Me too!  This makes me so happy!  Oh, but call me Izzy.  You’re a friend after all.”  In her excitement, she spoke a little too loudly for the library and was rewarded with a “SHH!” from Miss Kindall. 

 

Levi chuckled softly at the girl’s enthusiasm.  “I can tutor you after school if you want.  I’m already tutoring Eren, and since you live only a couple of doors down from him, it shouldn’t be a problem.”

 

Izzy’s face lit up even brighter.  “You mean it?” she whispered excitedly.  When he nodded, she leapt up and threw her arms around his neck.  “You’re the best!  Wait . . . how’d you know where I live?”

 

“I’ve been staying with the Jaegers since Friday.  Saw your flaming red hair go by on your way home on Tuesday.”

 

Izzy reached up and played with a lock of her red hair.  “Yeah.  My mother was horrified when I was born with Great Grandpa Sedly’s red hair.  Of course, Grampy was thrilled.  He and I get into all kinds of trouble together!”  This is where Izzy began to chatter away endlessly.  Only the bell signaling the period’s end put a halt to her prattling and forced her to finally breathe.

 

As they parted ways to go to their separate classes, Levi was happy to have made a new friend.

 

* * *

 

 

Levi was mentally, physically and emotionally exhausted once school finally let out for the day and Carla picked him and Eren up.  The day had gone better than he’d feared, but it was still surprising to have the worst of his tormentors arrested.  He wasn’t sure he was ready to deal with the fallout.  Angry parents would be trying to contact his parents, only to find that they too were in jail.  He feared that those unjustly outraged parents would then come directly after him.  Pixis, Nile, Zackary and Grisha had all assured him that they weren’t going to let that happen.  He collapsed onto his and Eren’s shared bed and fell asleep before even having supper.

 

As Pixis had promised, things were eventually okay.   Levi’s parents were both sentenced to twenty years in prison.  Once she was born, Levi’s sister, named Mikasa, was taken in and raised by the Jaegers and Levi doted on her; she was going to know beyond all shadow of a doubt that she was truly loved. 

 

Kyla, along with several other of his tormentors, were sent to the Youth Detention Center until they were 18, and all of his tormentors were forced to do community service as well as go through psychiatric evaluation and counselling.  All of her parent’s money and influence were unable to prevent her punishment. Kyla’s parents, along with a few of the other parents, were also prosecuted for negligence and required to pay financial restitution to Levi. 

 

Levi soon found himself with a lot of friends, mostly from Eren’s circle of friends.  He also made friends of his own, including Izzy and soon after a transfer student named Farlan Church.  He was elated to be able to spend time with his cousin, Petra again, and got to know her friends, three of whom, Gunther Shultz, Eld Ginn and Oluo Bossard, Levi referred to as her “groupies”.  For the first time in his life, he felt both safe and loved.

 

No longer on hormones, his natural biology kicked in and his voice went from a high tenor to a rich baritone in just three months.  His body, now properly fed, began to fill out, and his activity level meant that he also began to develop some impressive muscle tone.  He joined the mixed marshal arts club at school and trained with new friends Annie Leonhart, Bertolt Hoover and Reiner Braun, and fast became the top kick-boxer in the school.  He even won a regional championship.

 

Upon graduating high school co-valedictorian with a boy named Armin Arlert, and right before he and Eren started college, he got a tattoo on his back, across his shoulders to symbolize his rebirth.  He designed a highly stylized pair of feathered wings that crossed at the bottom.  The left wing was filled in solid black and the right was just outlined.  He called them the wings of freedom.

 

* * *

 

 

**Ten Years Later…**

 

Levi was smiling so much that his cheeks hurt.  He grinned down at the tiny new life in his arms.  Eren had a similar grin on his face as he looked down and the week-old little boy they were adopting.  Levi and Eren had married three years ago once they’d received their bachelor’s degrees.  Levi was continuing for his master’s degree in fine arts while teaching classical arts at the local university.  Eren was also continuing for his master’s while teaching chemistry at the same university.   They lived in a small house they’d bought and renovated together just a couple of blocks from Grisha & Carla’s house.

 

Jean and his new wife Amanda were to be the baby’s god-parents.  Mikasa, now almost ten, was excited about becoming an auntie, and Carla couldn’t even begin to contain her elation at becoming a Yiayiá.  For now, the two men enjoyed the quiet moment with their new son, knowing the quiet would not last long.  “What should we name him?” Eren asked as he kissed Levi lovingly on the cheek.

 

“I was kind of thinking maybe Nico, after Papa,” Levi replied.  “I know Papa’s full name is Nicholas, but I like Nico better.”

 

Eren’s brilliant smile never faded.  “I think that’s an awesome idea!  How about Nico Elias Jaeger?  That gets Opa’s name in too.”

 

“It’s perfect.”  Levi gave Eren a chaste kiss on the lips.  “I love you, Eren Jaeger.”

 

“I love you too, Levi Jaeger,” Eren replied.

 

Life was far from perfect, but after his rough start, to Levi, this life was blissful heaven.  He had friends and a family whom he loved and who loved him in return.  He had the education he’d always dreamed of and a job he loved, encouraging young people to pursue their passions.  He had a nice home and now a new child to raise.  He sometimes remembered that this almost never was.

 

“What’s wrong?” Eren asked, sensing the change in his beloved’s mood.

 

“I never thanked you for saving my life that day,” Levi stated, catching Eren off guard.  “If you hadn’t walked in and cut me down that day; if you hadn’t loved me in spite of finding out I wasn’t a girl – none of this would be happening.  Everything I have now is because of you, Eren.  I owe you everything.  So, thank you.  Thank you for giving me my wings.  Thank you for saving my life; in more ways than one.”  The smile returned to Levi’s now teary face as he kissed his husband, this time more deeply.

 

Eren wrapped his husband and new son in his arms and kissed back.  “I did it selfishly,” he admitted.  “I didn’t want to lose you.  I wanted to see you fly.   I loved you more than life itself.  I still do.  I always will.”  He then chuckled.  “Listen to how sappy we’ve become.”

 

Levi laughed in agreement.  “Well, sometimes the sappy has to be said and heard.  I’m just glad we’re both here to say them.”

 

Eren hugged them one more time.  “Let’s take our son home.”

 

Levi didn’t know what the future held, but he knew that whatever lay ahead could be faced with Eren at his side.  He had his wings and he would fly with them.

 

 

 

 

 

* * *

 

All fifty states in the [United States](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States) have passed school anti-bullying legislation, the first being [Georgia](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Georgia_\(U.S._state\)) in 1999. Montana became the most recent, and last, state to adopt anti-bullying legislation in April 2015.  Countries around the world have begun passing anti-bullying legislation as well.  The laws vary widely from state to state and country to country with varying definitions and responses to bullying, including verbal, physical, sexual, text and cyber bullying.  They are far from perfect laws, but they are a start and are evolving as gaps are found.


End file.
